Depp in 2004!

Johnny Depp, known for his quirky roles in Edward Scissorhands and Pirates of the Carribean (as well as a host of others), should run for President. After reading his latest comments, he'd definitely get my vote. His remark regarding "freedom fries" is spot on. Depp said:

I was ecstatic they re-named 'French Fries' as 'Freedom Fries'. Grown men and women in positions of power in the U.S. government showing themselves as idiots.

You tell 'em, Johnny. Depp in 2004!

Customer of the Year!

Knowing my obsession with female-fronted power pop and punk, Gene suggested that I give a listen to Metric. I did and, of course, found myself at CD Baby ordering the CD. Today, I received word that my order had shipped. I love their "Your order has shipped" message:

Your CD has been gently taken from our CD Baby shelves with sterilized contamination-free gloves and placed onto a satin pillow.

A team of 50 employees inspected your CD and polished it to make sure it was in the best possible condition before mailing.

Our packing specialist from Japan lit a candle and a hush fell over the crowd as he put your CD into the finest gold-lined box that money can buy.

We all had a wonderful celebration afterwards and the whole party marched down the street to the post office where the entire town of Portland waved 'Bon Voyage!' to your package, on its way to you, in our private CD Baby jet on this day, Sunday, August 31st.

I hope you had a wonderful time shopping at CD Baby. We sure did. Your picture is on our wall as 'Customer of the Year'. We're all exhausted but can't wait for you to come back to CDBABY.COM!!

Thank you once again,

Derek Sivers, president, CD Baby
the little CD store with the best new independent music

If only more companies had this much fun while servicing their costumers.

Civics Class

Here's a follow-up to yesterday's Mooregasbord.

Civics

I found the following paragraph particularly poignant:

But the Constitution doesn't just protect church from state and vice versa. It was also designed to protect the minority from the tyranny of the majority - from the indifference with which the majority sometimes wields power.

And that's the crux of the matter, really. The Constitution, particularly the Bill of Rights, was put into place to protect those in the minority from the sometimes-oppressive discourses of the majority. When it comes right down to it, it doesn't matter how many people oppose the removal of the monument.* Ninety-eight percent of U.S. Americans could be opposed to removing the monument and it would still have to go. If Moore or anyone else wants to announcement their Christian beliefs to the world, they have plenty of opportunities. Wear a cross, stick a Jesus fish on your car, erect a prayer altar in your home, put a stone version of the Ten Commandments in your back yard, and attend a candlelight vigil at your local house of worship. If Christianity (or any religion for that matter) offers someone the spiritual solace they need, terrific. I'm thrilled when someone finds a spiritual path that works for them. However, when that other person tries to represent their spiritual path as the path of all citizens, as is the case when a monument is erected on state property, I'll be crying foul.

*Like the author of this op-ed piece, I suspect U.S. Americans would be singing a different tune if I erected a monument that included a pentagram (the five pointed star that represents the five elements of Wiccca: Earth, Air, Fire, Water, and Spirit), the words of Buddha, or lines from the Tao Te Ching.

DAY OF MINDFULNESS

A week from today, Kathleen and I are getting married. As we both practice an eclectic blend of Buddhism, Taoism, Earth-based spirituality, and New Ageism, we decided to enter our life-partnership during a private ceremony: the only people attending will be Kathleen, myself, and Sandra Marie (a spiritual teacher with whom Kathleen has studied for many years). Our families, as one might expect, weren't thrilled with our decision. Our response was simple: "This is our wedding and we want it to be about the two of us. Besides, none of you follow our spiritual path. You won't even get it. There won't be any 'til death do us part' or "do you take thee" stuff. We're forging a spiritual partnership and, to be quite honest, you aren't part of that." In keeping with the spiritual theme of the weekend, we asked my parents to give us a special wedding gift.* Sunday, the day after our wedding, we're attending a Day of Mindfulness gathering with Thich Nhat Hanh. Thich Nhat Hanh is a well-published and well-traveled Buddhist monk who was once nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize. A brief description of the seminar, sponsored by Naropa University, follows:

On this day, Thich Nhat Hanh will teach us about the practice of mindfulness in our daily lives, how to touch that source of peace, solidity, and freedom that is in each one of us. This practice transforms the seeds of suffering that lie deep in our consciousness, allowing us to be an instrument of healing and transformation for our families and our society.

There's more on Mindfulness at the Plum Village website. Plum Village is a Buddhist monastery founded by Thich Nhat Hanh during the early 1980s.

*If we hadn't specified a gift, my parents would have purchased something like a gas grill. I'm a vegetarian.

Mixed Grill

Today's Special: Mooregasbord

Moore's Law
Unholy Commandment
Roy's Rock*

*For the record, Maggie, I'm a deeply spiritual person and I oppose Moore's monument to the Ten Commandments. I would also oppose ANY monument that references ANY spiritual belief system. Religion and government shouldn't mix. No exceptions. The separation of Church and State--it's not just for secularists, anymore.

Spam Your Way Back to the Future

While the article positions this guy as a wackadoo, what if he's telling the truth? In how many episodes of Star Trek has someone said, "We can't tell them we're from the future [insert "another planet" here, as well]. They'll never believe us."

The Time Machine

Fallen

Long before becoming obsessed with female-fronted punk & power pop, I discovered Sarah McLachlan. Although I don't listen to her as often as I once did, I still think she has one of the most amazing voices in the music industry. After a long hiatus, Ms. McLachlan has a new CD coming out this fall. The first single from the album just hit the airwaves in Canada. If you poke around the newsgroup alt.music.s-mclachlan, you may stumble across the single.

Fallen (S. McLachlan)

Heaven bent
to take my hand
and lead me through the fire
We've a long awaited answer
to a long and painful fight
Truth be told I've tried my best
but somewhere along the way
I got caught up in all there was to offer
and the cost was so much more than I could bare

Though I've tried,
Fallen
I have sunk so low
I messed up
better I should know
so don't come 'round here
and tell me, "I told you so"

We all came with good intent
and love was raw and young
We believed we could change ourselves
the past could be undone
But we carried on our back the burden
Time always reveals
and the lonely light of morning
in the wound that would not heal
It's the bitter taste of losing everything
that I've held so dear

I've Fallen
I have sunk so low
I messed up
better I should know
So don't come 'round here
and tell me, "I told you so"

Ooooooh

Heaven bent
to take my hand
No where left to turn
I've lost all those i thought were friends
to everyone I know
Oh they turned their heads embarassed
Pretend that they don't see
that it's one mistep, one slip before you know it
and there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed

Though I've tried
Fallen
I have sunk so low
I messed up
better I should know
So don't come 'round here
and tell me, "I told you so"

Oooh
I messed up
better I should know
So don't come 'round here
and tell me, "I told you so"

Help others

The essence of Buddhism is that if you can, help others. If not, then at least refrain from hurting others.

The Dalai Lama

Random Conversation: Suburban Rebel

Derek: Kathleen, he does that because you don't put Clay on his leash. You're ticked at him and you're the one breaking the rules.

Kathleen: I am breaking the rules and I'm not going to follow them.

Derek: You rebel.

Kathleen: That's right.

The Worst

According to Blender magazine, the following are the fifty worst bands of all time.

1. Insane Clown Posse
2. Emerson, Lake and Palmer
3. Michael Bolton
4. Kenny G
5. Starship
6. Kansas
7. Asia
8. Vanilla Ice
9. Lee Greenwood
10. Air Supply
11. Latoya Jackson
12. Tin Machine
13. Mick Jagger
14. Yngwie Malmsteen
15. Yanni
16. Oingo Boingo
17. Benzino
18. Pat Boone
19. Dan Fogelberg
20. Howard Jones
21. The Alan Parsons Project
22. Primus
23. Creed
24. Bad English
25. Jamiroquai
26. Celine Dion
27. Colour Me Bad
28. Crash Test Dummies
29. Skinny Puppy
30. Richard Marx
31. Arrested Development
32. The Hooters
33. Japan
34. Live
35. Paul Oakenfold
36. 98 Degrees
37. The Doors
38. Nelson
39. Bob Geldof
40. Blind Melon
41. Whitesnake
42. Rick Wakeman
43. Mike and the Mechanics
44. Manowar
45. Gipsy Kings
46. The Spin Doctors
47. Goo Goo Dolls
48. Master P
49. Toad the Wet Sprocket
50. Iron Butterfly

You can check comments on numbers 50-41 here. The rest are available in the print magazine. Although not a regular reader, I may have to track down this issue.

Academic Sojourn

Since I mentioned it in my previous post, here's a snippet of my academic writing.

Throughout my academic sojourn I have always self-identified as a rhetorician, a critical scholar committed to understanding the ways in which communication, both discursive and non-discursive, is employed as a means of constructing, negotiating, and transforming ourselves, others, and the world around us. Most of my recent scholarship focuses on constitutive rhetoric, a performative enterprise that accentuates “the constitution of the subject, where the subject is precisely he or she who simultaneously speaks and initiates action in discourse (a subject to a verb) and in the world (a speaker and social agent) (Charland, 1987, p. 133). With an emphasis on Becoming-in-the-world as opposed to Being-in-the-world, constitutive rhetoric is the interweaving of discursive and non-discursive communication in the everyday social practices of “doing, acting, performing, and accomplishing” (Schrag, 1986, p. 19). From this perspective, the collaborative co-construction of the self, other, and concomitant subject positions occurs in the “space of communicative activity” (Langsdorf, 1993, p. 44).

Grrrrrr. w00t!

For the first time since Monday or Tuesday, I actually found time to sit down and work on my dissertation. I've been struggling with a two page section on postmodern rhetorical criticism. How do you describe a methodology for a philosophical position that has "question everything" as its primary tenet? Maybe I'll post the section when I finally work it out.

Getting frustrated over that particular section yet again, I turned to wrapping up the rest of Chapter One. Just as I'd finished laying out the content of Chapter Four, my computer crashed. As the PC rebooted, I offered words of great praise to the academic Gods and Goddesses: please let there be a backup file. My pleas fell on deaf ears. The existing backup file didn't include a significant portion of my recent work. Looks like I'll be reworking that entire section tomorrow. Grrrrr. How I resisted the temptation to throw my PC out the office window is beyond me.

If anything, this recent problem has motivated me to increase my timetable for a new PC. I'm looking at a system with the following configuration:

AMD Athlon 2500+ Barton Core
512 DDR 333 RAM
80 GB 7200 RPM HD
ATI Radeon 9500 Pro 128 MB DDR Video Card

I'll probably order the PC through ABS Computer. I priced all the components and I'd only save a few bucks if I built the system myself. It's not a top-of-the-line machine, but the motherboard will allow for future upgrades of the CPU. It's a definite improvement over my almost three-year-old system (1 GB, 256 RAM, 20 GB HD, Radeon 7200 32 MB). I'll sleep on it a couple days and make a decision. As Kathleen reminded me tonight, "We've known for some time that you'd need a new computer. Now is as good a time as any." With any luck, the new machine will arrive in time for the release of Jedi Academy! w00t!

Today's Spam

Is it just me or does the amount of spam seem to be increasing? The following are examples of spam I received recently. The phrase preceding the colon is the email subject; the phrase following is the first line of the spam.

What are you up to: Want to quickly and safely increase your penis size?

Need a hug: Generic Viagra!

You are the one and only: Generic Viagra!

apskxxm Fatten up that hott ddogg kkqshh: Enlarge your penis guaranteed

WS It Haarrd - Wow!dlwwd: Real Viagra at unreal prices

I waatch.that_waist.liineftsop: Online pharmacy free next day shipping

nmi)Get)inside)a lady)with it harddnnfl: Real Viagra at unreal prices

KKIs it ttoo small for love?coluyy: Enhance your manhood

Utu Faattten up that member ekx: Enhance your manhood

mggk Shed unwanted kilo'st: Online pharmacy

Thank goodness I use a free email account for all my internet purchase. The spammers haven't found my home accounts . . . yet.

Harry Potter Withdrawals?

Mike, a long-time friend of almost twenty-five years, has a handful of remedies for treating those nasty Harry Potter withdrawals.

Like many of you, I waited anxiously for "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix". Now that it's out and I've read it, I know it'll be another 2 years (or 3? 4? even more?) until we get another installment. In other words, I'm having Harry Potter withdrawals.

If you are having similar issues, let me recommend two fantasy book series that you may enjoy.

The first is the "Mancer" series by Don Callander. I've had these books for several years and read them several times. The first book, "Pyromancer", tells the story of young Douglas Brightglade, a lad who becomes apprenticed to a wizard and studies pyromancy (the magic of fire). He becomes involved in a battle to save World from the power of the evil ice wizard Frigeon. Along the way he meets other interesting characters, human and otherwise. Further adventures of Douglas and his friends are told in the other three books of the series, namely "Aquamancer", "Geomancer", and "Aeromancer".

These books are simple and light-hearted with, in the words of one reviewer, aspects of a fairy tale. The characters are likeable, even if some of the dialogue is a little contrived at times. The plots have occasional interesting twists, though there is never really any doubt that the good guys are going to win. In fact, the surprise is more in how they win than in the fact that they do. There are some interesting concepts here too, like the idea of defeating the bad guy by turning him back to good. All in all, it's a fun series to read but lacks the depth--and especially the angst, thank heavens!--of the Harry Potter books.

Second and more highly recommended is a series by Philip Pullman called "His Dark Materials". I first became aware of this series at a University of Utah bookstore display intended to offer, you guessed it, help for those suffering from Harry Potter withdrawal. Incidentally, this display also recommended "The Lord of the Rings" and "The Chronicles of Narnia", both of which I heartily endorse. Unfortunately, it also recommended the "Artemis Fowl" and the "A Series of Unfortunate Events" books. Although I have never read these series, I am assured by my wife (among other people) that they can be safely ignored. One review I read on the former series seems to sum it up: "If you read the Harry Potter books thinking that Draco Malfoy should have been the hero, you'll love Artemis Fowl."

The three books in "His Dark Materials" are "The Golden Compass", "The Subtle Knife", and "The Amber Spyglass". This story, spread over all three books, tells of the adventures of two young people, Lyra Silvertongue and Will Parry, who come together from two different worlds to help each other accomplish a mission that neither one fully understands. The two young people are almost continually in danger, and though there are several memorable supporting characters, they have to rely mostly on themselves and on each other. As they face nigh-impossible odds, the fate of countless worlds hangs in the balance.

I thought the author did a good job developing the characters in this series, especially Lyra and Will. Lyra is adventurous, curious, headstrong, and imaginative (and occasionally prone to making up stories). Will is quiet, determined, introspective, responsible, and practical. Both are caring, loyal, and exceptionally brave. Better yet, they inspire goodness and bravery in those who come to know and love them. Even two of the significant villains of the piece are moved to self-sacrifice by their feelings for Will and (more importantly) Lyra. True, these two have their shortcomings, but they learn from their mistakes--are you listening, Harry?--and become better people for their experiences. In short, they are good, likeable characters, and easy to cheer for. (Unlike, for example, the above-mentioned Artemis Fowl.) The supporting cast are also complex and well thought out. Of particular interest here are such characters as Texan aeronaut Lee Scoresby, a bear named Iorek Byrnison, witch queen Serafina Pekkala, university researcher Dr. Mary Malone, society lady Mrs. Coulter, and Lyra's Uncle, Lord Asriel.

"His Dark Materials" is a deep and very complex story. It involves all sorts of things that science fiction and fantasy fans will love: magic talismans, enchanted weapons, windows between worlds, theoretical physics, Victorian-era technology ("The Golden Compass" especially has an Imperial London feel to it), theological mysteries, parallel universes, witch clans, armored bears, non-human civilizations, arctic exploration, adventures at sea, heroic rescues, unexpected betrayal, devious villains who appear to be good guys, loyal friends, and heroes who put themselves in harm's way so that the right can prevail. Above all there is the quest (a central element of almost any good fantasy story) that draws in Lyra and Will for seemingly different reasons. The plot is intricately woven and hard to follow at times, but the resolution is satisfactory and leaves the reader (okay, me) wishing there could be another book in the series.

So there you have it. I give the "Mancer" series by Don Callander a B and "His Dark Materials" by Philip Pullman a solid A. And if you haven't read "The Chronicles of Narnia", what's wrong with you? Read it! Yes, I admit it's a little slow sometimes, but C.S. Lewis was a Brit, so what do you expect?

Anyway, I wish you all happy reading. And if any of you have read anything good in this vein lately, let me know. I'll be needing something new to read...in twelve weeks or so.

--M

Take This Pledge and Shove It

Several months ago, a group of Colorado legislators introduced a bill making the Pledge of Allegience mandatory in Colorado public schools. In short, the bill required each student, with a few exceptions (religious beliefs, non-U.S. citizens), to stand at the beginning of each day and recite the pledge. Legislators who supported the bill claimed that reciting the Pledge would help students develop a sense of patriotism. When the bill was introduced, I immediately phoned my state Representative and asked that he vote against such a ridiculous proposition. Considering the conservative makeup of the Colorado state legislature, however, nobody was suprised when the bill passed both houses. As such, Colorado students were to begin reciting the mandatory pledge this week. Thankfully, the ACLU intervened on behalf of teachers and students opposed to the forced recitation of the Pledge.

The Pledge

If the legislators, and people of Colorado who supported this bill, really want to instill a sense of patriotism and love of country in the State's young people, why do it through the Pledge of Allegience? The constitutionality of the bill aside, how does a mindless act, the repetitive chanting of a Pledge, increase anyone's patriotism? If the conservative legislature was truly committed to teach our children about the merits of the U.S. system of government, they'd concentrate on improving Civics, U.S. History, and U.S. Government classes.* The danger in such an approach, however, is that students might learn they have the rights of Free Speech, Freedom of Religion, and the like. Students might learn they have the right to dissent (peacefully) and question the actions of their leaders. Students should learn to love the U.S. through an understanding of the rights and protections afforded by the Constitution, not through the mandated recitation of a Pledge.

*Believe it or not, U.S. History was NOT required in my high school.

Tao

From Chapter One of the The Tao Te Ching

To conduct one's life according to the Tao,
is to conduct one's life without regrets;
to realize that potential within oneself
which is of benefit to all.

Specters of the Past

For the past five years, I’ve associated with the same group of people: Joe, Mary, and Keli. While the core of our friendship group has remained stable, the periphery has been in a constant state of flux. Significant others have come and gone, the excitement of a perspective romantic partner always replaced by the pain of a break-up or divorce. Oddly enough, each of us ended a long-term relationship within the last two years. Through a combination of phone calls, emails, coffee, and cigarettes (three of us have quit smoking within the last year), we navigated a storm of infidelity, mental illness, abuse, and irreconcilable differences . Mary and I were the first to make it through the maelstrom of relationship unhappiness, followed closely by Keli. Joe, recently divorced, is right behind. Looking back, I think our collective story is probably worthy of a novel. And one with a happy ending, too. With the addition of Charles, Mary’s fiancé, and Kathleen, my fiancé, the core of our friendship group has grown and stabilized.

Friday night, three of us (Mary, Joe, and myself) bumped into each other at our favorite Goth/Industrial club. Keli spent another Friday night working at the bookstore, of course. While we used to meet at the club every Friday, it’s been months since more than two of us have been out on a given night. In a strange convergence of events, the specters of our respective pasts also made an appearance. Joe’s ex-wife and her new boyfriend arrived early in the evening. Mary’s ex-boyfriend entered a few minutes later. Despite all the healing done, forgiveness granted, and time passed, there was still a palpable sense of discomfort in the air. Trying to add a little levity to the situation, I turned to Joe and Mary and said, “Well, if you-know-who [my former partner] made an appearance, I think we’d have one of our weirdest club nights ever.” Both laughed and nodded in agreement.

As one might expect, she did make an appearance of sorts. Late in the evening Mary approached me and said, “I just ran into a guy who’s still in touch with you-know-who. They email each other on a regular basis. Check this out . . . ” My ex-partner recently had a nervous breakdown, dropped out of her Ph.D. program (dissertation phase), and moved home to her parents’ to convalesce. While Kathleen expressed relief at knowing she’s hundreds of miles away, I felt relieved, angered, and saddened: relieved that I don’t have worry about running into her (she can be extremely volatile), angered by the fact she dropped out of school (I made a lot of sacrifices to help her get through her program), and saddened by her inability of find some peace of mind. Of the three, I think the third is the thing that bothers me most. No matter how much self-inflicted pain she experiences, she can’t admit she has psychological problems that need long-term treatment. I tried getting through to her, as did Mary, other friends, family members, and mental health professionals. She ignored each and every one us. Instead of accepting that her problems are of her own making, she’ll continue to blame everything on a world allied against her.

Sometime during the evening out, Joe made an astute observation regarding our group. He commented on how each of us had experienced a great deal of pain and how we’d each admitted our mistakes, learned from them, and made significant changes in our lives. He also commented that for having been through so much, we’re an exceedingly happy lot. Of all his remarks, however, one stands out. He said, “It’s taken us a long time to weed out all the riffraff. Finally, after five years, we’re all relatively happy and drama free. I think we should keep it this way for a while.” I couldn’t agree more.

Mixed Grill

Today's Specials:

Preventing Dissent*
Foucault Makes Me Hot**
Bogus Trendspotting
Spirituality and Daily Life
Dog Days of Summer

*Make sure you read the article by Krugman. The discussion thread has some great responses, too.

**I once asked my friend Amy, a student of Foucaultian philosophy, if she'd tutor me in Foucault's theories. Her response: "Of course. Foucault makes me hot."

True Character

I've just about had my fill of "Blackout" news. If I hear one more story about neighbors sitting on their front porch, basking in the light of candles and neighborly love, I think I'll vomit. When CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News resort to 24-hour-coverage of a blackout, you know it's a slow news week. I read an amusing quote while working out yesterday. Praising the reactions of those affected, President Bush stated:

The people of New York City and New York state and people of the Northeast and Midwest who were affected by last night's blackout kept their calm, were decent to their neighbors, really showed the rest of the country and the world the true character of the American people.

The true character of American people? Personally, I'd like to believe most human beings would step and help one another. I don't think the U.S. has the market cornered in that regard. Here's what the people of New York, Detroit, and Cleveland, and the surrounding areas should be asking.

*Why was it impossible to purchase anything?
*Why weren't retailers prepared to do business without a computer or cash register?
*Did anyone attempt to calculate discounts and sales tax using a battery powered calculator or ::gasp:: by using long-hand addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division?

What does it say about American character when the President applauds us for not flipping out in the dark? If you were afffected by the blackout, give yourself a pat on the back. You didn't loot the local convenience store and you didn't resort to hurting each other. Hooray! Think about this: for U.S. citizens, a blackout is a major inconvenience. For many people of our world, living without electricity, clean drinking water, and indoor plumbing is the normal state-of-affairs.

Mixed Grill

Several worthwhile reads:

Spam
Iraq: Civilian Death Toll
Dogs
One Hot Microbe
Mmmmmm Vanilla

Bon appetit!

Random Conversation

The following conversation occured at a local Saks 5th Avenue. The stranger is a late thirtysomething woman.

Stranger (approaches nervously): Excuse me, sir. This might seem like an odd question . . .

D: Okay.

Stranger: How do you get your hair to stand up like that?**

D: Uh, I use a product from the ICE line. It's kind of like hair glue. I use it in the morning and my hair stays up all day. You can get it at Ulta.

Strange: Thanks.

D: Sure. ::thinks to self:: What the fuck was that all about?

**Picture of my hair available on request. Shoot me an email.

New Music Monday

Yesterday, I received a package containing three CDs I special ordered. More and more, I'm finding myself drawn to music that's fairly obscure, at least to the Denver metro area CD merchants. Thank goodness for the internet. I received the following CDs:

The Skirts - Take Off
One Man Army - Rumors and Headlines
The Downbeat 5 - Ism

Today, I received notification from a local CD store that another special order had arrived.

The Epoxies - The Epoxies

You gotta love new music in your life.

19th Century Rebels

Introduced to the Transcendentalists some twenty years ago in Ms. Schulz's American Literature class, I remember feeling a sense of kinship. Something about their writings said, "We're like you. You're not alone." Whether it was their critique of Enlightenment thought, particularly the fanatical obedience to the masters of logic and the scientific method, or their rejection of 19th century Christian ideology, the works of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau resonated with me. Looking back on my 15-year-old self, I suspect it had little to do with the reasons my 35-year-old self just identified. In 1983, I cared little about critiquing Enlightenment thought or religious ideology. Instead, I was drawn to Emerson's attitudes regarding Self-Reliance and Thoreau's beliefs regarding Civil Disobedience. Truthfully, I know didn't fully grasp what either author was trying to convey. What I did understand, however, was that the Transcendentalists were the intellectual and theological rebels of their time. They listened to the unique whisper of their inner voice rather than the hive-like drone of the masses. As Emerson wrote:

"What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. This rule, equally arduous in actual and in intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness. It is the harder, because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it. It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude."

Today, I have a much better grasp of the "independence of solitude." Although one is likely to be branded a geek, nerd, dork, bookworm, rabble-rouser, or trouble-maker, there's a great degree of freedom that comes from following your own path. When I listen to my inner voice, and act accordingly, I know I'm doing what's right . . . for me.

The WTF Department

Child: Mommy, can I have a GI Joe for my birthday?

Mom: GI Joe? He's a wimp! He couldn't fight his way out of Grenada. Wouldn't you prefer the new George W. Bush: Elite Force Aviator? He's an army of one!

Child: Oh, boy!

George W. Bush: Elite Force Aviator

The Lovers' Knot

I presented the following blessing at Margie and Dan's wedding reception (July 25, 2003). As I presented the blessing extemporaneously, the text is not an exact transcript of my words. It's close, but not identical.

When I received Margie and Dan’s wedding invitation, my attention was drawn to the lovers’ knot gracing the top and bottom of the card. The lovers’ knot, a Celtic knot that looks like intertwined figure eights, symbolizes two together as one. When I researched the meaning of the lovers' knot, I discovered that different meanings are attributed to different knots. The trinity knot, for example, is thought to represent the Holy Trinity (Creator, Christ, and Holy Spirit). Spirals, on the other hand, symbolize personal spirit or the circle of life. I also discovered that there’s absolutely NO archaeological evidence to support the meanings we attribute to Celtic knot work. We don’t know what the ancient Celts were trying to communicate through their art. There’s a beauty in that, I think. Celtic knot work is ancient form of art that takes on new meaning in contemporary society.

Marriage is similar to knot work: marriage has different meanings for each us. Recalling Jesus’ first miracle, performed at a wedding in Cana, Christian marriage is a holy covenant of love, mutual respect, personal commitment, and shared fidelity. Taoism, a Chinese mystical philosophy, equates marriage with a spiritual union that sees perfect beauty, feels perfect happiness, and recognizes the perfect unity of all things. Practitioners of Goddess spirituality describe a life-partnership as a magickal union based on the principles of immanent value, openness, interconnectedness, individuality, and equality.

Regardless of the spiritual path you follow, whether you’re Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Taoist, Buddhist, Wiccan, Agnostic, or Atheist, your ideas, beliefs, and attitudes regarding marriage contribute to the meaning of Dan and Margie’s union. You’ve become part of their life-partnership, of their lovers’ knot. Tonight, I’m honored that Margie and Dan asked me to make my contribution to their lovers’ knot by way of a formal blessing.

May the blessings of Earth be with you. May mountains of health, prosperity, and family always keep you stable.

May the blessings of Air be with you. May the winds of communication, knowledge, and mindfulness always keep you aloft.

May the blessings of Fire be with you. May the flames of passion, creativity, and devotion always keep you warm.

May the blessings of Water be with you. May the currents of compassion, respect, and kindness always keep you afloat.

May the blessings of Spirit be with you. May the presence of magick, love, and the divine always keep you centered.

Random Conversation

Derek: What's up with Java*?

Kathleen: He's being a freak!

Derek: A freak of nature?

Kathleen: Like me.

*Java is our cantankerous black cat.

Heroes for Hire

After last week's post regarding worst comic book costumes, and the subsequent comments regarding Power Man and Iron Fist, I decided to do a little Heroes for Hire research. Ultimately, I wound up buying most of Heroes for Hire v. 2 on ebay. Derek's #1 rule of Ebay comic book buying: Never pay more than a $1 per comic.

With issues 1-16 on their way, I'll need to find issues 17-19 to complete the set.

Long Live Lonetree!

During my AD&D years, I played a number of characters: a dwarven fighter, a half-elven cavalier, a human monk, a magic-user (briefly), and a druid. Lonetree the Druid, a neutral good, half-elven druid, was by far my longest running, and favorite, AD&D character. Over the course of several years, Lonetree advanced through his order and assumed the title of Great Druid (that's the day he retired). Going through my regular blog-reading routine, I stumbled across an AD&D character test (Thanks Tiffany. My results: Lawful Good Half Elf Ranger Druid. Imagine that.

I Am A: Lawful Good Half-Elf Ranger Druid


Alignment:
Lawful Good characters are the epitome of all that is just and good. They believe in order and governments that work for the benefit of all, and generally do not mind doing direct work to further their beliefs.


Race:
Half-Elves are a cross between a human and an elf. They are smaller, like their elven ancestors, but have a much shorter lifespan. They are sometimes looked down upon as half-breeds, but this is rare. They have both the curious drive of humans and the patience of elves.


Primary Class:
Rangers are the defenders of nature and the elements. They are in tune with the Earth, and work to keep it safe and healthy.


Secondary Class:
Druids are a special variety of Cleric who serves the Earth, and can call upon the power in the earth to accomplish their goals. They tend to be somewhat fanatical about defending natural settings.


Deity:
Mielikki is the Neutral Good goddess of the forest and autumn. She is also known as the Lady of the Forest, and is the Patron of Rangers. Her followers are devoted to nature, and believe in the positive and outreaching elements of it. They use light armor, and a variety of weapons suitable for hunting, which they are quite skilled at. Mielikki's symbol is a unicorn head.


Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy ofNeppyMan (e-mail)

Random Conversation

Derek: You're a freak of nature.

Kathleen: That's right.

200 Greatest Popular Culture Icons

A couple days ago, Mike emailed and asked my opinion about VH1's Greatest Pop Culture Icons list. Here's what I think.

I'm assuming the 200 are ordered by status as a pop culture icon. According to VH1, each icon must pass one or more of the following criteria:

Do they pass the one-name test?
Can you dress up as them for Halloween?
Did they blaze a trail in pop culture?
Did they create a signature character in pop culture?
Can you quote them, or their character, in 10 seconds or less?
Did society imitate their sense of fashion? Hairstyle?
Did “SNL” create a sketch satirizing them?
Did someone write a song about them?
Was or is there merchandising or paraphernalia that bears their image?
Can they be connected to Kevin Bacon?

With that in mind, I have a few thoughts.

My first observation is that the list is overloaded with recent pop culture icons. Can we really say that the likes of Justin Timberlake, James Gandolfini (as Tony Soprano), Helle Barry, Reese Witherspoon, Ben Affleck (::gags::), Martha Stewart, The Osbournes (as amusing as I find their show), Brad Pitt, George Clooney, and Eminem (how do they justify ranking him higher than Johnny Carson?!) have achieved the status of icons? That being said, the producers of the show are not stupid. I'm sure they sprinkled recent stars throughout the list in order to keep the attention of younger viewers. Am I supposed to believe that Tom Cruise is a greater icon than The Beatles? Please.

A few names on the last that I find absolutely baffling:

The Rock--Where's Hulk Hogan?
Cartman--Give me a break. Cartman's character is definitely rude and obnoxious. Is that one of the criteria?
Macaulay Culkin--WTF?! I think I'd put him up there with Leif Garrett.
Dr. Phil--the guy has been around for five years or so. How can he be one of the top 200 icons of all time?!
Venus/Serena Williams--Great tennis players but most people won't know who they are.
P. Diddy--another person most U.S. Americans won't recognize.
Pamela Anderson--Aarrrgghhhhh!
Friend's Cast @ 11--you have to be kidding.

Here are a few that I think should be included (apologies if I missed them on the list):

James Bond
Charlie Chaplin
Jack Benny
Errol Flynn
Bettie Paige
Richard Nixon
Larry Bird
Little Richard
The Carpenters
David Letterman
Ed Sullivan
The Sesame Street gang (particularly Big Bird, Cookie Monster, Oscar, Bert & Ernie)
Jim Henson
Captain Kangaroo

I'm sure there are others but these are the first to sping to mind. Here's a challenge: name 10 women who should have been included on the list.

Random Conversation

Derek: You know me, I don't mind being the center of attention. I kind of like it.

Kathleen: You're always the center of my attention.

Derek: Bonus points for that comment.

Kathleen: I thought so.

Worst Costumes

Gene sent me a link to the following site. What were these artists thinking?

Worst Superhero Costumes

The fact that I'm familiar with each of the characters listed is even scarier than the costumes themselves. Yes, I still read comic books.

Derek's Current Comic Book Favorites
1. Green Lantern
2. Iron Man
3. Avengers
4. Justice Society of America
5. Star Wars: Republic
6. Justice League of America
7. JSA: All Stars (limited series)
8. Outsiders
9. Star Wars: Empire
10. The Power Company

The Highway to Hell

Between a week-long trip to the heartland (Minnesota & Iowa) and wedding planning, I haven't had any time to blog the last couple weeks. This post should signal the return of regular blogging. I'm sure my adoring audience is cheering.

Big news this morning? Satan's Highway, Highway 666, has officially been renamed Highway 491. There goes one of my my quirky vacation destinations.

Enough is Enough!

It's only 48 hours after the Eagle County D.A. filed sexual assault charges against Kobe and I'm already sick of the entire affair. More specifically, I'm sick of hearing the accuser described as a gold-digger, NBA groupie, slut, tramp, someone with an agenda, etc. Give me a break, people! Kobe already admitted that he committed adultry. Doesn't that undermine his credibility just a little? To those who were "touched" by Kobe's emotional statement last Friday, go back and watch for deception cues. His performance was as artificial as Sweet-n-low. Do I believe he sexually assaulted the accuser? I have absolutely no idea. That's for a jury to decide, not me. What I do know is that he got caught with his pants down. Literally. And the one who's being demonized--the accuser. And on that note, the following is a piece from the New York Times. I usually don't post entire articles but the NYT is a password access site.

An Accuser Has No Fans or Voice
By HARVEY ARATON


OW the game begins for the superstar lawyers hired by the basketball legend. Now they become the money players.

"We will not try this case in the press," Pamela Robillard Mackey said with Perry Mason solemnity Friday night.

But soon came a classic crossover, a show of staged sentiment timed strategically for "SportsCenter." Soon Mackey's new client, Kobe Bryant, and the young wife he betrayed were center stage at the Staples Center, hands clasped, tears welling in the corner of Bryant's eyes as he publicly — and quite poetically — professed his sorrow "for committing adultery," while maintaining his innocence to a felony charge of sexual assault in Edwards, Colo.

Appearing to gesture to the audience in the arena in which Bryant has crafted his fame, he thanked "everybody out there for their support," as if the attending "you guys" of the news media had been part of the script. Perhaps Bryant, in a show of wisdom well beyond his 24 years 11 months, intuitively recognized that it was and would probably continue to be.

Meanwhile, out in Oklahoma, in a heartland setting not unlike the Colorado mountain county from which the prosecution will have to find jurors impervious to the aforementioned promotional prowess, one viewer admitted to being moved.

Except it wasn't for Kobe Bryant, not by a long shot.

"My heart goes out to this girl," Alison Jennings said of Bryant's 19-year-old accuser late Friday night from Oklahoma. "I know how hard it is to do this. I know what it's like to suddenly realize that people don't believe you, or don't want to believe you, because they have been corrupted to think that the athletes they love are not capable of doing such a thing."

Though she was speaking from experience, it should be noted that Jennings never faced the kind of national spectacle that looms in the Kobe Bryant case, for which his accuser, I am told, has been advised to hire her own high-powered law team to defend against the mud surely to be slung.

The athletes Jennings accused of gang-raping her at a college party almost four years ago were football players at Oklahoma State. Criminal charges were never filed against the players, two of whom now play in the N.F.L.: Marcellus Rivers of the Giants and Alvin Porter of the Baltimore Ravens. Jennings later said that she, as a traumatized 22-year-old student, had signed a waiver of prosecution after being told by the police that her story was not corroborated and that she did not have a case.

Whatever happened on the night of Nov. 21, 1999, in Stillwater, Okla., Jennings's life soon ground to a halt. Her grades plummeted. She suffered from post-traumatic depression. In almost four years of pursuing a spate of civil suits (settlements were recently reached with Rivers and Porter), Jennings and her family say the most devastating lesson of all has been how athletes are protected and how quickly a woman who accuses them can be vilified as a gold-digging groupie trying to find fame.

•

In the fishbowl of University Town, U.S.A., college athletes can pack as powerful a punch as Kobe Bryant does on a global scale. After filing her civil suits, Jennings said, she dreaded even going to a grocery store. She was made to feel like "that girl" who was trying to bring down the local franchise.

Supporters of Bryant decry the belief that his reputation is being tarnished by charges, not conviction. But his accuser, far from anonymous, is widely known in Edwards, the way Jennings eventually was in Stillwater. "And who would want to read about themselves in the newspaper and hear the awful things that people will say about them?" Jennings said. "Who in their right mind would want to put themselves in a position like this, where people are calling you a liar and believing the worst about you?

"What are the odds, really, that someone would make this up?"

Far from evidence, that at least is a good question for those so quick to publicly hang their disbelief on Bryant's much-hyped character. Presumption of innocence does not mean the accuser is prejudged to be lying, but that is the implicit message when basketball insiders like Mark Cuban, the Dallas Mavericks' owner, come out and say he is certain Bryant will emerge from this mess as the good guy.

That is part of the rush to judgment for the athlete — not against — that makes such cases all the more daunting to proceed with.

Even Friday night, the television talking heads — those who say they have known Kobe since before he was this one-name cottage industry — were expressing shock that he could commit adultery, much less sexual assault. Isn't it amazing how depending on the athlete and his corporate connections, the perception of him can swing from one extreme to the other, from occupying a den of iniquity to Ward Cleaver's house?

•

"The problem in charging an athlete is that it intensifies the rage and backlash factor so much more than the normal situation," Tamara Brion-Gowens, one of the lawyers who represented Jennings in her civil suits, said in a telephone interview from Oklahoma City. "The athlete has fans. They have easy access to the media. They have a voice."

Jennings, for her part, would, if given a chance, advise Bryant's accuser not to listen to the voice in her head. "You think everyone is against you," she said. "You suddenly feel the magnitude of what you have gotten yourself involved in. You feel depressed and scared. And every time you turn on the television and see the player being interviewed, most of all, you feel like he has all the power and you have none."

WTF Department: Naked Bambi Hunt?!

This has to be some kind of twisted joke:

Naked Bambi Hunt

I'm so stunned by this article that I don't know how to respond. Do we really live in a world this pathetic?

Great Gadamer!

If you're interested in studying hermeneutics, take a look at Hans-Georg Gadamer's Truth and Method. Hermeneutics, the study of interpretive understanding, is an interesting sub-point in my dissertation project. According to The Chronicle of Higher Education, a new biography questions Gadamer's activities during the era of the Third Reich.

Gadamer

Inspirational Art

A year ago, I stumbled across the first piece of art that ever made me stop and say, "I must own that piece." Unfortunately, the show ended before I had the chance to corner the artist and the piece slipped through my grasp. I recently attended an art festival and the artist in question was displaying her work. When I noticed my piece wasn't on display, my heart sank. Not willing to give up hope, I approached the artist and inquired about the piece. She still had the piece and was thrilled that I remembered it.

The piece, titled Nobody's Bitch, now hangs in my office.

WTF Department: Sausage Assault

During last night's Brewers/Pirates game, Pittsburgh's first baseman allegedly "attacked" (tripped is probably more accurate) a sausage mascot with a bat.

Whack-a-Sausage

What's with the sausage hate, Randall?

Queen of the Ad Hominem

Is there a media figure more ridiculous than Ann Coulter (Other than Michael Savage, of course)? Regarding liberals she states, "They are either traitors or idiots, and on the matter of America's self-preservation, the difference is irrelevant " (link). While I don't see myself as either a "traitor" or an "idiot," I suppose it's a matter of perspective.

Here's another interesting piece on Coulter:

Senator McCarthy was a Hero!

With heroes like McCarthy, who needs villains?

Senseless

How many more senseless deaths do we have to endure? There has to be a better way to liberate a country.

Convoy Attacks

I wish I had a solution or suggestion (other than find a different way to affect regime change), but I don't.

Happy Independence Day

Is there anything more American than The McGriddle?

Pancakes, eggs, and sausage--an entire heart attack inducing breakfast--designed to be eaten with one hand. Brilliant! God bless America.

Bring 'em on!

President Bush responds to recent attacks by anti-U.S. militants in Iraq:

Shoot-from-the-hip-one-liner

Bring it on they did:

1 soldier dead, 16 wounded

Is this for real? Is Bush really the President of the most powerful nation on this planet? Aaaargh!

Fancifying Tastes

Joshua, you're preaching to the choir:

Coffee Snobs Unite

Unlike Joshua, however, I avoid the "specialty" coffee drinks. I'll take a piping hot cup of coffee, a cafe americano (espresso & hot water), or espresso shot over a Vanilla Nut Cappuccino, a White Chocolate Coconut Mocha (with whipped cream), an Iced Caramel Macchiato, or a Chocolate Malt Frappacinno. How can anyone taste the coffee through all the syrupy flavors? A friend of mine once said, "Coffee tastes like dirt." I responded, without missing a beat, "You have an unsophisticated palate." Dirt indeed.

One last thing: two nights ago a friend served me a cup of Folgers or Maxwell House. With milk instead of half & half. I can't tell the difference between the bulk U.S. American coffees--they all taste equally horrible. There's no such thing as a "good" cup of bulk coffee. I took two sips of the wretched brew and couldn't stomach any more ::gag:: When offered a refill, I muttered something about having had to much coffee throughout the day. It's my firm belief that one can never have too much coffee. The next time we're invited over for dinner, I'll bring a bag of gourmet coffee beans and a pint of organic half and half as a "gift." As Joshua's article suggests, we all need to do our part and help cultivate a culture of sophisticated coffee drinkers.

The Coffee Snob

As many will attest, I am a certifiable coffee snob. My coffee must meet certain standards:

1. Filtered water.
2. Freshly ground beans (preferably organic and free trade).
3. Freshly brewed coffee--nothing over one hour old.

Don't even mention the words "7-11 coffee," "Folgers," or "powdered creamer" if you don't want me to laugh you out of a room. My coffee snobbery is so well-known that I am expected to bring coffee (all of my friends have Brita water filters, thank goodness) to all dinner parties, the baristas at local campus coffee houses know me by name, and friends/relatives know nothing lights up my face better than a gift certificate to Kaladi Bros.

Being a coffee snob, I have a tremendous love/hate relationship with Starbucks. Given the choice, I will always choose a local coffee house to a Starbucks. I realize, however, that most local coffee houses wouldn't even exist if not for Starbucks. Starbucks made the gourment coffee trend a nationwide phenomena. Without Starbucks, most people wouldn't know a latte from an americano. In that regard, Starbucks has done me a great service. When I'm travelling, I always know I can get a cup of gourmet java even if it means resorting to Starbucks. Side note: Starbucks coffee beans are way over-roasted. Every cup leaves a slight aftertaste reminiscent of the smell of burning leaves. Burning leaves smell great in the autumn; they're not so great when fused with a cup of coffee. So what's the problem? Starbucks is attempting to take over the world:

25,000 Stores?!

By 2013, the Starbucks corporation hopes to have 25,000 stores?! Are you kidding me? That's roughly four times the present number! I'm all in favor of a company making some cash on a product but 25,000 stores? Starbucks, from what I understand, is an ethical company (or at least more ethical than most) trying to make good decisions for employees, the environment, and even the coffee farming industry (Starbucks is moving toward free trade coffees, slowly but surely). Ethical or not, do we really need a Starbucks on every corner? How about a Starbucks on every corner at an intersection? As the above article points out, this is not unusual. Case in point: a new shopping center opened a few blocks from my residence. The center includes a Target, CompUSA, Ross, Linen & Things, Petsmart, and a couple dozen lesser retail outlets. Just in case you get that gourmet coffee craving, there are also three Starbucks. I'm not joking. THREE Starbucks all within two minutes of one another (that two minutes is for those who like to stroll--you could easily walk from one Starbucks to the next in under a minute).

With three Starbucks in the area, you can bet there isn't an independently owned coffee house within miles. And that is why I hate Starbucks. In my experience, independently owned coffee houses sell a far superior product, provide a warmer general atmosphere, and offer a richer experience overall. I'm all about grabbing a book or my laptop and heading to my local coffee house to read and write. The Starbucks atmosphere isn't very conducive to that kind of experience. It's too sterile and has that overly commercialized artificial java joint feel. Definitely not what I'm looking for in my coffee drinking experience.

We're Just Wild About Harry

Less than one week before the next installment of Harry Potter's adventures is released. As pointed out by many, the hoopla surrounding this book release is unprecedented.

Great Big Hoopla

I've heard many people say, "This is ridiculous. Harry Potter books aren't classic children's literature! Harrumph!" Maybe Rowling's books aren't classic children's literature. Who knows. What I DO know is that Rowling's Potter series gets people to read. Millions of people, from first graders to centenarians, read Harry Potter. So, bring on the hoopla! Anything that gets millions of people reading is good in my book (pun intended). I'll be picking up my copy sometime next week.

If I could only get Rowling to write the adventures of Fred and George Weasley . . .

Always Low Wages

Wal-Mart remains at the top of my "Do Not Shop" list. While the store touts "Always Low Prices," those low prices come at a cost to Wal-Mart workers.

Wages

Contrary to what many believe, I have nothing against a major corporation making a substantial profit. However, I do take issue with a company like Wal-Mart making substantial profits at the expense of employees. I haven't set foot in a Wal-Mart in two years and will continue to avoid these dens of exploitation.

The Loch Ness Monster

I'm absolutely fascinated by the legend of the The Loch Ness Monster. At least once a week, I hit a series of websites that report cryptozoological sightings. Ten days ago proved an active day for Nessie spotting.

Record Day

For the record, I do believe something unusual inhabits the dark Scottish loch.

"Dude, you look just like . . ."

A few days ago, Gene and I talked about celebrity comparisons. A celebrity comparison is when someone comes up to you and says, "Hey, you look just like . . ." For whatever reason, I get compared to celebrities frequently. Here's a list of all the celebrities to whom I've been compared--at least the ones I can remember.

Alex P. Keaton (Michael J. Fox)

Jim Carrey

Joseph Fiennes

Trent Reznor

Jeff Buckley

Alice Cooper

Ozzy Osbourne

Dave Navarro

Sid Vicious

What an odd assortment of celebrity comparisons.

Presidential Lies?

As time passes, President Bush and Prime Minister Blair are feeling increasing pressures regarding Iraq's Weapons of Mass Destruction, weapons which once posed a grave and imminent danger to the freedom of people around the world. Well, where are these weapons? Several sources report the WMD weren't there to start. Instead, the Bush & Blair administrations used the specter of WMDs to drum up public support.

Might & Right
Deceptions
Heat

If weapons of mass destruction weren't the primary motivation behind a war, as we were publicly told, why did we need to invade Iraq?

Corked

As a baseball fan (and Cubs fan), the last few days have been maddening. If you've been living underground and missed the news (or maybe you're not a baseball fan), Sammy Sosa got caught using a corked bat. The process of corking a bat is fairly simple: drill out the center of a bat, fill with crushed cork, reseal the bat, and voila, you're a major league slugger! The common argument behind the illegal practice is that quicker bat speed results in longer fly balls. A little research, however, suggests bat corking actually decreases the distance of a fly ball.

What Advantage?

More important than the physics involved is the issue of Sosa cheating. Sports reporters have been talking about little else this week. Does Sosa deserve the label of cheater and an eight-game suspension? You bet. Without question, he violated the rules of the game. The question that comes to my mind is, "Why are we making such a big deal about Sammy Sosa?" Baseball is a game of cheaters. Sluggers use steroids or other supplements to increase their bulk, players take ephedra to enhance performance, and pitchers doctor the ball. Pitchers are, without question, the most deceptive of the lot. Irv Brown, a local talk show host and former college baseball coach, claims the vast majority of major league pitchers doctor the ball. They either put a foreign substance on the ball (vaseline, soap, KY jelly, spit) or scuff it (wedding ring, emery board, catcher slices the ball on pad buckles). Irv counted Greg Maddux, Curt Schilling, and Jamie Moyer among those who doctor the ball. In fact, Irv suggested that the practice was the norm rather than the exception.

If this is true, and I believe it is, why single out the big sluggers who get caught using a corked bat? Why don't we see more pitchers being chastised or punished? Why don't we see all cheating targeted? If Major League Baseball is really concerned about this issue, why don't they institute steroid/supplement testing? Performance enhancing drugs don't give certain players an unfair advantage? Puh-lease. I'd like to see MLB address all these issues and put some integrity back in the game.

So Many Governments

One of my favorite on-line newspapers offers an opinion on "destabilizing" Iran.

So Little Time

Avoiding Overtime

Once one looks past the false marketing, the naked truth about H.R. 1119 is revealed. It is nothing more than a scheme to allow employers to avoid paying for overtime, a scheme that will result in longer hours, lower incomes, and less predictable workweeks for American workers.

How much longer are U.S. Americans going to put with this kind of chicanery?

Mixed Grill

A smorgasbord of reading material:

Gods and Social Science
Poetry & Self-expression
Water World
America is a Republic
In the Public Interest?

Recovery

Ten years ago tonight, at this very moment, I had my last drink of alcohol. I poured a half-finished can of Olympia beer down the sink, put on a pot of coffee, and started reading AA literature. Nine years of drinking finally caught up with me. I had my first blackout at sixteen, drove under the influence thousands of times, and hurt more people than most others do in a lifetime. My relationship with my family was hanging by a thread, my marriage was a shambles, my remaining friends could be counted on one hand (with fingers to spare), and my self-loathing had reached its zenith. I wasn't a particularly violent drunk, at least not with people. I avoided physical altercations with others, but tended to break things like windows, phones, answering machines, walls, and my bones (cracked patella, broken knuckles, and fractured elbow). I was, however, particularly nasty when it came to verbal altercations. I was arrogant, self-serving, and exceedingly angry. I drank when I was happy, sad, and indifferent.

When I tell people I'm in recovery they always ask, "What changed? Why did you decide to quit?" I wish I had an answer. All I know is that my life was spiralling out of control and, after my eighth beer on June 1, 1993, I decided I'd had enough. I attended my first AA meeting the following day and haven't had a drink since. Ten years later, my life has totally changed. My relationship with my family is better than ever, I'm engaged to be married, I don't have enough fingers and toes to count my friends, my self-loathing is virtually non-existant, and I'm happy most of the time. While I still possess a fiery temper, my anger is focused. I rarely get angry at individuals. Instead, most of my anger stems from what I perceive as social inequities and ills. I'm rarely nasty anymore, but consider myself a formidable debate opponent. Most importanly, I have a set of spiritual principles by which to live my life.

In ten years of sobriety, one lesson stands above the rest: All my problems are of my own making. I am responsible for the choices I make, the actions in which I engage, and the ways I attribute meaning to everyday occurances. If I get angry or frustrated at someone the question isn't, "How do I make them stop?" but "Why am I letting them get under my skin?" As an AA friend once said, "Why let someone live in your head rent free?" If I start to feel guilty about all the people I harmed during my drinking days the question isn't, "Why did I have to be an alcoholic?" The salient question is, "Why haven't you forgiven yourself?" I am responsible for everything I say, do, and feel.

Today, drinking isn't an answer to any of my problems. And for that I am grateful. As a friend of mine once said, "Everything is better when you're sober. Everything."

Dating Rules are Stupid

Why do people insist on making dating so complicated?

In Contempt of Courtship

Like the author of this article, I can't help but wonder why singles adhere to a ridiculous set of rules that make dating a near-impossibility. Given that my last stint in "the Game" ended a year ago, I remember all the advice given by well-meaning friends:

1. If you get her number, wait 48 hours to call. Expect her to wait 48 hours before she returns your call.
2. If she talks children or marriage on the first date, run like hell. That's a clear indication of a desperate woman.
3. If you have fun on the first date, call and let her know the next day. After that, return to the 48 hour rule.
4. Don't give her flowers until you're an "item." Giving someone flowers makes you look desperate.
5. Don't do dinner or a movie on the first date. If things go badly, you can't bail.

I also heard, from a woman I was casually dating, that the Third Date = Sex rule also applies. On our third date, we had a conversation that went something like the following.

She: You know, my friends don't think you're all that interested in me.
Me: Really? Since I haven't met your friends, I'm surprised they'd have any impression.
She: You haven't tried to sleep with me.
Me: Hmmmm. Well, I don't really know you that well. I like to know someone before I have sex with them.
She: Okay.

And we never went on another date. To be honest, I found the entire conversation so ridiculous that any interest I did have waned quickly. Her tendency to slam eight to ten vodka tonics in a four hour period also helped squelch any desire for another date. Slurred speech and a tipsy gait are so sexy. Not that I have anything against a purely physical encounter. If two mature adults want to celebrate human sexuality, have at it. Safely.

My friend Janet once gave me the best possible dating advice: "There are no rules for dating. Dating rules are stupid. If you like her, call her the next day. If you feel like giving her flowers, give her flowers. Just be yourself. If someone doesn't like you for who you are, including all your interests, quirks, faults, and foibles, you probably don't have a romantic future with them." When Kathleen and I started dating a year ago, we broke all "the rules." I called her the day after getting her number (and continued to call whenever I wanted, as did she), we split the cost of every date, she asked me out frequently, we waited well beyond the third date before sex entered the picture, and we talked about everything. We talked about our views of marriage, children, careers, and spirituality, all within the first three dates. Almost a year later, we're madly in love and planning our wedding. Screw the rules.

My advice: quit reading The Rules and quit watching The Bachelor/Bachelorette. While you're at it, quit looking to Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus and Dr. Phil for answers. All that pop psychology crap isn't worth the paper on which it's printed (A rant for another day). I've considered publishing my own tome on dating. However, I'm not sure I can convince a publisher to accept a five page treatise.

Pg. 1 Be kind.
Pg. 2 Be honest.
Pg. 3 Be yourself.
Pg. 4 Communicate openly and honestly.
Pg. 5 Dating rules are stupid.

I can't wait for my invitation to appear on Oprah.

Lesbian Wiccans Save America

Finally, a columnist who speaks my language.

Morford

The Garden Weasel

While reading a friend's blog, I came across a post titled, "Garden Weasel." The title stirred a memory I'd long forgotten. Almost two decades ago, a commercial for a lawn cultivation too aptly named The Garden Weasel played during every televised Chicago Cubs baseball game. I'd see the commercial and think to myself, "If I were into gardening, which I'm not, I'd have a Garden Weasel." How weird is that? At the time, my fanaticism for the Chicago Cubs was at its peak. I watched almost every game, knew the batting average and ERA of every player, and dreamed of taking Harry Caray's place in the broadcast booth. My passion for the Chicago Cubs and baseball play-by-play eventually led to a career as a Communication Studies academic. I entered my freshmen year of college as a Speech Communication major with an emphasis in broadcasting. My experiences with the broadcasting industry, however, quickly led to disillusionment and I switched my emphasis to rhetoric. From the Chicago Cubs to broadcasting to rhetorical theorist--what an interesting career path. Today, amidst the rigors of academic writing, paper grading, and lecturing, I still want a Garden Weasel. Oh, and I still cringe at the thought of gardening. Give me a good book any day.

"Artificial Black Hole Escapes Laboratory, Eats Chicago!"

According to this piece, scientists will soon be able to manufacture miniature black holes. My brain can barely wrap itself around the notion of a black hole, let alone the technology needed to create one.

The Axis of Evil: Target Number Two

More on Iran:

Tougher Stance

Freedom, the First Amendement, and Baseball

One more piece of required reading for the day.

A Chill Wind . . .

America's Most Prominent Leftist

Michael Moore is one of my favorite political activists/entertainers. If you've ever seen him in person, you can't deny the passion behind his criticisms of the U.S. political system. As much as I like his political agenda, his work is not above criticism. Moore frequently resorts to hyperbole, liberal interpretations of narrative sequences, and sensationalism to drive his points home. Kevin Mattson, a writer for Dissent Magazine, presents what I feel is a fair and accurate critique of Moore's efforts.

Political Criticism in an Age of Entertainment

While I agree with much of Mattson's critique, one section deserve's the attention of my critical eye. In the following paragraph, a paragraph focused on Moore's Bowling for Columbine, Mattson questions the cause-effect link between U.S. military action in Sudan and the actions of the Columbine shooters. Mattson writes:

As reviewers have pointed out, the logic of Bowling for Columbine often fails. One example, not yet noted, symbolizes a central problem in Moore's work. In trying to explain why Columbine happened, Moore floats the idea that Bill Clinton ordered a bombing in Sudan around the time of Columbine. He moves backward to show the violence endemic to American foreign policy, cutting and splicing together decontextualized images of America in Iran (1950s), Vietnam (1960s), Central America (1980s), and the Middle East (1990s). Clearly Moore was using this imagery to build up a sense of America as an inherently violent world power-arguing that America's violence is being turned against itself. If I followed his logic, he was also suggesting a specific link between American foreign policy and the Columbine killings. I admit to no knowledge of these particular students, but I find it hard to imagine they followed news about American action abroad, and I'm even surer they knew little about American intervention in Iran during the 1950s or even where Iran was. What I was left with were the decontextualized images Moore flung together in the hope that they would add up to a provocative point. But all I really had were decontextualized images.

I think Mattson missed the point of Moore's argument. Rather than trying to make a direct link between Columbine and U.S. foreign policy decisions, Moore suggests a broader cultural problem. If I follow Moore's logic, and I think I follow it a great deal better than Mr. Mattson, he's trying to illustrate one of the great contradictions in our society. As a people, we generally agree that violence is NOT an effective means of settling disputes. Many of our laws enforce this tacit agreement. Conversely, our federal government, the ultimate arbiter and enforcer of our laws regarding violence, employs violence as a means of solving problems. In other words, Moore isn't arguing that a military operation in Sudan spurred the Columbine shooters into action. Rather, his argument is that we live in a culture of violence. Mattson needs to widen his critical lens. Taken as a whole, Bowling for Columbine also identifies sensational journalism, the NRA, corporate commercialism, the welfare state, the TV and film industries, and racism as contributors to a U.S. culture of violence. If we choose to live in a society which supports U.S. foreign policy through "Might makes right," floods our living rooms with violent television images, and protects the rights of parents who use corporal punishment as a form of discipline, how can we not expect a certain percentage of people act violently?

Back to the specific sequence of images--Moore argues that our government's past military operations run contrary to the social contract by which the rest of society lives. The military operations are not used to draw a direct cause and effect relationship, but to suggest a broader cultural view of violence. Put in syllogistic form, the argument looks like this:

People who live in a violent culture may be subjected to violent acts.
U.S. students live in a violent culture.
Therefore, U.S. students may be subjected to violent acts.

Presidential Stagecraft

Yet another article concerning the Bush administration's deft use of visual images.

Stagecraft

The article poses some interesting questions. First, why wasn't there a larger outcry after the May 12 bombings in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia? Second, why is the U.S. public allowing itself to be misled by visual images? Why aren't we asking questions about the policies being endorsed? Third, why aren't we seeing more images of a post-war Iraq? Why aren't we receiving the same intense coverage we received during the war? Could it be that the situation isn't quite what the Bush administration had hoped for?

Here We Go Again

According to CNN, the Bush administration is discussing possible efforts to destabilize Iran. Can anyone honestly say they didn't see this coming?

I hope I'm this eloquent when I'm Senator Byrd's age.

The Truth Will Emerge

Trendiness

A little light reading for a foggy Sunday morning:

Minimalist Fantasies

Dixie Sluts

As the patriots of the American public decried the inflammatory remarks of the Dixie Chicks, Kellog Brown & Root (a subsidiary of Halliburton) managed to land a secret, no-bid contract to administer Iraqi oil operations. Why pay attention to adminstration cronyism when we can boycott the Dixie Chicks?

Let me also make note of the way in which the Dixie Chicks were criticized. Instead of addressing the remarks made by Natalie Maines, critics resorted to name calling: Dixie sluts and whores were two of the most scathing. Question: how does an indictment of Presidential policy even remotely relate to sexual promiscuity (sluts & whores)? Answer: it doesn't.

Collateral Damage

And people wonder why I opposed military action in Iraq? For several thousand Iraqi civilians, "liberation" has taken on new meaning. While the members of the Bush administration may be the official leaders of my country, I will oppose their neo-conservative ideologies, beliefs, and attitudes at every opportunity. Bush supporters will no doubt call me anti-American, unpatriotic, and even Communist, as they already have. If that's the price of expressing a view grounded in spiritual principles opposed to the use of violence as a means of settling any dispute, then I'll gladly take the heat.

Thank God we're hot chicks with superpowers

Several years ago, I received one those "Get to Know You" email questionnaires. You know the type. These questionnaires typically ask for an assortment of sundry information: favorite food, hometown, and the like. This email, however, possessed a unique question: Who is your perfect woman or man? Without a second thought, I picked Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

For seven years, I devoted one hour a week to the exploits of Buffy, Giles, Willow, and Xander. Tuesday night, Buffy and the Scooby gang staked their last vampire, beheaded their last demon, and averted their last apocalypse. The Hellmouth, at least the one in Sunnydale, is forever closed. When I tell people I'm a fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, they frequently shake their head, laugh outright, or offer a dismissive eye roll. Have these people ever watched the show? Quite honestly, Buffy the Vampire Slayer has been one of the few well-written television programs over the last seven years. How many other programs manage such an intricate weave of humor, horror, and drama? I suspect the people who criticize Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the same folks who laugh hysterically at Dude, Where's My Car? Complex humor, like that presented in Buffy, is always a difficult sell.

With the series drawing to a close, a number of excellent articles have appeared on-line.

Lord of the Nerds
We Could Be Heroes
Xander and the Vampire Slayer

For the more academic minded, numerous articles are archived at The On-line International Journal of Buffy Studies.

Farenheit 911

If you're a fan of Michael Moore, you'll want to read this piece on his next documentary, Farenheit 911. Looks like Moore is cooking up an inflammatory documentary.

Quirkiest Coloradoan

Is there any doubt that Hunter S. Thompson, the strung-out Aspen author and recluse, is the quirkiest Coloradoan? His drugged-out adventures and paranoia are legendary. According to Aspen legend, Thompson once become so frustrated with his writing that he pulled out a gun and shot a typewriter. The victim of Thompson's rage, the typewriter, hangs on the wall of the Aspen Hard Rock Cafe. I've seen it! Wether he really shot the typewriter as a result of writer's block is anybody's guess.

Can you believe the guy is still writing? One particular quote caught my eye:

Reviewers have despairingly characterised Thompson's persona as a coked-out prophet in the Book of Revelation, a hillbilly bookworm on speed, a psycho-path with an arsenal of high-powered weapons, a paranoid gun junkie, a womaniser, a drunk and worse. While all these descriptions are provable in various degrees, the truth is far weirder: most of the time Hunter Thompson is a strangely modest man, a serious thinker, a great wit, a superb satirist and a sports fan. He is 60-something, and he grew up, as I did, at a time when the greatest American writers were remote and powerful figures.

I tried to read Thompson's Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas several years ago and it did nothing for me. Different strokes, eh?

Constructing a Presidential Image

Speaking of style over substance, why has the media taken a sudden interest in the President's image?

Stagecraft

The Spectacle: Style Over Substance

As a science fiction geek, I loved the The Matrix. Like the second Star Wars trilogy, however, it sounds more and more like The Matrix Reloaded has committed the cardinal sin of postmodern film-making: style over substance. One of the defining elements of postmodern media is the spectacle. In essence, the image becomes more important than the plot, dialogue, and character development. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I like a good summer blockbuster as much as the next geek. Given the deep philosophical content of the The Matrix, I guess I was hoping for more. When I see The Matrix Reloaded, I'll leave my expectations in the lobby.

Media Manipulation 101

Today must be Don't Trust the Media Day or something. While going through my morning news-reading ritual, I stumbled across a couple articles detailing the way in which media images are manipulated. Does it come as a huge surprise that President Bush's appearances are staged? How can a President reach "ordinary people" when everyone who attends a public appearance is probably part of the economic elite? Have everyone sitting behind the President take off their ties.

Of greater concern than audience members instructed to remove ties is a piece appearing on the BBC News website. According to a correspondent for the BBC, the U.S. military staged the dramatic special forces rescue of POW Jessica Lynch. A similar story appears in the Guardian. It would appear, my fellow Americans, that we've been played. Why stage such a dramatic rescue? We need war heroes, damnit! What better way to simultaneously raise the ire and patriotic spirit of the U.S. people! Not only do we see our brave boys engaged in (insert your favorite action hero)-like heroics, but we have a damsel in distress. It's no wonder Jessica Lynch has amnesia. She probably wants to forget the way in which she was used by her own employer, the military. Buck up, Jessica! A movie deal is surely in the works.

"They have the right to be lost."

Thank you, Paster Beeler, for giving me the permission to stumble about blindly on my own spiritual path. How a public school can justify a religion-based field trip is beyond me. Oh, wait! The school doesn't "promote, endorse, or prohibit" the students from attending the religious revival. Privately-contracted school buses (the regular bus drivers are paid by a private institution) ferry students back and forth to the revival, teachers act as chaperones (voluntarily), and the school board claims the school doesn't sponsor the event? Give me a break. If it quacks like a duck, has webbed feet liked a duck, and walks like a duck, it's usually a duck.

The worst part of the entire affair is the young woman being persecuted for her religious beliefs. Why do some people feel the need to "educate" those of us who are "lost" (in this case, lost means non-Christian)? Please, just let us do our own thing. You know what's really funny? I don't feel lost at all. In fact, I've never been more sure of my spiritual path. Once again, Pastor Beeler, thanks for giving me permission to do my own thing.

Finally, someone is paying attention to the possibility of additional FCC deregulation

New FCC

An excellent article regarding high culture

Test, test, test.

Neo is the Everynerd

Teaching Bonus

We all know about the lousy pay given to teachers of all levels. There are moments, however, when I receive a teaching bonus. I read through seventy-five Women and Communication journals this weekend. As a whole, reading journals is preferable to slogging through poorly written papers. I'll have seventy-five papers sitting on my desk by tomorrow afternoon. Journaling, at least in my class, is a three-part exercise. First, students log daily observations regarding gendered communication. This part of the process generates awareness of the issues we're studying in class (in theory, at least). Second, students write responses to the reading assignments for the class. They can agree, disagree, or express ambivilance toward the material we read. All I ask is that they back up their position. At the most fundamental of levels, I'm looking for a minimal level of engagement. Finally, I ask students to generate weekly class concept essays. In a class concept essay, a student picks a theory or idea from class and shows how it applies to their own life. Through journaling I move my students through a process of awareness, engagement, and application. Pretty nifty, eh?

As I neared the never-ending pile of journals, I stumbled across the following entry. The entry is reproduced as originally written.

I guess as my last journal entry I want to do something a little different. I would like to say thank you to the women along the way for everything that they have done to allow me to be in the position that I am today. Without women who were courageous enough to take a stand against the status quo, we would still be in the position that placed us in the home only. The home is a beautiful place and those women who have done a tremendous job at bringing families into this world should be praised as well for the contributions to society. This class has opened my eyes in more ways than I thought possible. There is a lot to continue fighting for. Women have seen a tremendous amount of growth and more is still possible. I have grown into a woman who demands respect as a women from others. I have become an observant woman of the society that surrounds me. I have faith in the things that women are capable of and I am inspired by the things that women before me have done. The beauty of the pieces that we read touched my heart and offered new insight into the ways that other people think. The conversations allowed people within class to voice their beliefs and inquire about the things that were unclear. I have enjoyed this class more than any other before it because it was so unique in what it had to offer women in particular. It has been an inspiration and the lessons I have learned will always be part of my heart, thankfully.

Messages like this one make up for the crummy pay.

Tired

One of the courses I'm teaching this semester is Women and Communication. Throughout the semester we examine the gendered inequities entrenched in our society. While there are numerous joys that come from teaching this class, there is one major frustration. I am SO tired of hearing people say, "Gendered inequities? What? Men and women are totally equal." Oh, really? Take a look at what one of my students wrote recently in her journal.

Tonight I went to the liquor store and immediately got whistled and hollered at about five times. I was dressed in jeans, a tank top, and flip-flops. So it definitely wasn't anything that should have drawn attention. When men do this it makes me feel just like a piece of ass. It sucks. Maybe I will just start wearing sweats everyday!

Equality my ass. As my student's experience points out, women are still treated as sexual objects. How often are men subjected to this kind of objectification? Not very often.

In the Public Interest?

Once upon a time (The Radio Act of 1927), broadcasters were granted licenses with the understanding that they were to serve the public interest, convenience or necessity. Somewhere along the way, broadcasters lost their way:

Channels of Influence

Today seems like an appropriate day to revisit the most memorable Presidential Address of my childhood.

Challenger Speech

How to Spot Gulf War II Propaganda
The Bachelor or The Bachelorette: Is There a Difference?
Maxim Bashes Gandhi

An interview with Kurt Vonnegut. I hope I'm that articulate and passionate when I'm his age.

According to the Chicago Tribune, Goth is going mainstream! The horror!

Welcome to Bush-o-nomics

While watching Crossfire last night, one of the commentators labeled Bush's "economic stimulus package" a form of class warfare. At the very least, giving a break to the wealthiest one percent of U.S. Americans is nothing short of A Seriously Dumb Tax Cut

Hip Hop and Globalization