We're Just Wild About Harry

Less than one week before the next installment of Harry Potter's adventures is released. As pointed out by many, the hoopla surrounding this book release is unprecedented.

Great Big Hoopla

I've heard many people say, "This is ridiculous. Harry Potter books aren't classic children's literature! Harrumph!" Maybe Rowling's books aren't classic children's literature. Who knows. What I DO know is that Rowling's Potter series gets people to read. Millions of people, from first graders to centenarians, read Harry Potter. So, bring on the hoopla! Anything that gets millions of people reading is good in my book (pun intended). I'll be picking up my copy sometime next week.

If I could only get Rowling to write the adventures of Fred and George Weasley . . .

Always Low Wages

Wal-Mart remains at the top of my "Do Not Shop" list. While the store touts "Always Low Prices," those low prices come at a cost to Wal-Mart workers.

Wages

Contrary to what many believe, I have nothing against a major corporation making a substantial profit. However, I do take issue with a company like Wal-Mart making substantial profits at the expense of employees. I haven't set foot in a Wal-Mart in two years and will continue to avoid these dens of exploitation.

The Loch Ness Monster

I'm absolutely fascinated by the legend of the The Loch Ness Monster. At least once a week, I hit a series of websites that report cryptozoological sightings. Ten days ago proved an active day for Nessie spotting.

Record Day

For the record, I do believe something unusual inhabits the dark Scottish loch.

"Dude, you look just like . . ."

A few days ago, Gene and I talked about celebrity comparisons. A celebrity comparison is when someone comes up to you and says, "Hey, you look just like . . ." For whatever reason, I get compared to celebrities frequently. Here's a list of all the celebrities to whom I've been compared--at least the ones I can remember.

Alex P. Keaton (Michael J. Fox)

Jim Carrey

Joseph Fiennes

Trent Reznor

Jeff Buckley

Alice Cooper

Ozzy Osbourne

Dave Navarro

Sid Vicious

What an odd assortment of celebrity comparisons.

Presidential Lies?

As time passes, President Bush and Prime Minister Blair are feeling increasing pressures regarding Iraq's Weapons of Mass Destruction, weapons which once posed a grave and imminent danger to the freedom of people around the world. Well, where are these weapons? Several sources report the WMD weren't there to start. Instead, the Bush & Blair administrations used the specter of WMDs to drum up public support.

Might & Right
Deceptions
Heat

If weapons of mass destruction weren't the primary motivation behind a war, as we were publicly told, why did we need to invade Iraq?

Corked

As a baseball fan (and Cubs fan), the last few days have been maddening. If you've been living underground and missed the news (or maybe you're not a baseball fan), Sammy Sosa got caught using a corked bat. The process of corking a bat is fairly simple: drill out the center of a bat, fill with crushed cork, reseal the bat, and voila, you're a major league slugger! The common argument behind the illegal practice is that quicker bat speed results in longer fly balls. A little research, however, suggests bat corking actually decreases the distance of a fly ball.

What Advantage?

More important than the physics involved is the issue of Sosa cheating. Sports reporters have been talking about little else this week. Does Sosa deserve the label of cheater and an eight-game suspension? You bet. Without question, he violated the rules of the game. The question that comes to my mind is, "Why are we making such a big deal about Sammy Sosa?" Baseball is a game of cheaters. Sluggers use steroids or other supplements to increase their bulk, players take ephedra to enhance performance, and pitchers doctor the ball. Pitchers are, without question, the most deceptive of the lot. Irv Brown, a local talk show host and former college baseball coach, claims the vast majority of major league pitchers doctor the ball. They either put a foreign substance on the ball (vaseline, soap, KY jelly, spit) or scuff it (wedding ring, emery board, catcher slices the ball on pad buckles). Irv counted Greg Maddux, Curt Schilling, and Jamie Moyer among those who doctor the ball. In fact, Irv suggested that the practice was the norm rather than the exception.

If this is true, and I believe it is, why single out the big sluggers who get caught using a corked bat? Why don't we see more pitchers being chastised or punished? Why don't we see all cheating targeted? If Major League Baseball is really concerned about this issue, why don't they institute steroid/supplement testing? Performance enhancing drugs don't give certain players an unfair advantage? Puh-lease. I'd like to see MLB address all these issues and put some integrity back in the game.

So Many Governments

One of my favorite on-line newspapers offers an opinion on "destabilizing" Iran.

So Little Time

Avoiding Overtime

Once one looks past the false marketing, the naked truth about H.R. 1119 is revealed. It is nothing more than a scheme to allow employers to avoid paying for overtime, a scheme that will result in longer hours, lower incomes, and less predictable workweeks for American workers.

How much longer are U.S. Americans going to put with this kind of chicanery?

Mixed Grill

A smorgasbord of reading material:

Gods and Social Science
Poetry & Self-expression
Water World
America is a Republic
In the Public Interest?

Recovery

Ten years ago tonight, at this very moment, I had my last drink of alcohol. I poured a half-finished can of Olympia beer down the sink, put on a pot of coffee, and started reading AA literature. Nine years of drinking finally caught up with me. I had my first blackout at sixteen, drove under the influence thousands of times, and hurt more people than most others do in a lifetime. My relationship with my family was hanging by a thread, my marriage was a shambles, my remaining friends could be counted on one hand (with fingers to spare), and my self-loathing had reached its zenith. I wasn't a particularly violent drunk, at least not with people. I avoided physical altercations with others, but tended to break things like windows, phones, answering machines, walls, and my bones (cracked patella, broken knuckles, and fractured elbow). I was, however, particularly nasty when it came to verbal altercations. I was arrogant, self-serving, and exceedingly angry. I drank when I was happy, sad, and indifferent.

When I tell people I'm in recovery they always ask, "What changed? Why did you decide to quit?" I wish I had an answer. All I know is that my life was spiralling out of control and, after my eighth beer on June 1, 1993, I decided I'd had enough. I attended my first AA meeting the following day and haven't had a drink since. Ten years later, my life has totally changed. My relationship with my family is better than ever, I'm engaged to be married, I don't have enough fingers and toes to count my friends, my self-loathing is virtually non-existant, and I'm happy most of the time. While I still possess a fiery temper, my anger is focused. I rarely get angry at individuals. Instead, most of my anger stems from what I perceive as social inequities and ills. I'm rarely nasty anymore, but consider myself a formidable debate opponent. Most importanly, I have a set of spiritual principles by which to live my life.

In ten years of sobriety, one lesson stands above the rest: All my problems are of my own making. I am responsible for the choices I make, the actions in which I engage, and the ways I attribute meaning to everyday occurances. If I get angry or frustrated at someone the question isn't, "How do I make them stop?" but "Why am I letting them get under my skin?" As an AA friend once said, "Why let someone live in your head rent free?" If I start to feel guilty about all the people I harmed during my drinking days the question isn't, "Why did I have to be an alcoholic?" The salient question is, "Why haven't you forgiven yourself?" I am responsible for everything I say, do, and feel.

Today, drinking isn't an answer to any of my problems. And for that I am grateful. As a friend of mine once said, "Everything is better when you're sober. Everything."

Dating Rules are Stupid

Why do people insist on making dating so complicated?

In Contempt of Courtship

Like the author of this article, I can't help but wonder why singles adhere to a ridiculous set of rules that make dating a near-impossibility. Given that my last stint in "the Game" ended a year ago, I remember all the advice given by well-meaning friends:

1. If you get her number, wait 48 hours to call. Expect her to wait 48 hours before she returns your call.
2. If she talks children or marriage on the first date, run like hell. That's a clear indication of a desperate woman.
3. If you have fun on the first date, call and let her know the next day. After that, return to the 48 hour rule.
4. Don't give her flowers until you're an "item." Giving someone flowers makes you look desperate.
5. Don't do dinner or a movie on the first date. If things go badly, you can't bail.

I also heard, from a woman I was casually dating, that the Third Date = Sex rule also applies. On our third date, we had a conversation that went something like the following.

She: You know, my friends don't think you're all that interested in me.
Me: Really? Since I haven't met your friends, I'm surprised they'd have any impression.
She: You haven't tried to sleep with me.
Me: Hmmmm. Well, I don't really know you that well. I like to know someone before I have sex with them.
She: Okay.

And we never went on another date. To be honest, I found the entire conversation so ridiculous that any interest I did have waned quickly. Her tendency to slam eight to ten vodka tonics in a four hour period also helped squelch any desire for another date. Slurred speech and a tipsy gait are so sexy. Not that I have anything against a purely physical encounter. If two mature adults want to celebrate human sexuality, have at it. Safely.

My friend Janet once gave me the best possible dating advice: "There are no rules for dating. Dating rules are stupid. If you like her, call her the next day. If you feel like giving her flowers, give her flowers. Just be yourself. If someone doesn't like you for who you are, including all your interests, quirks, faults, and foibles, you probably don't have a romantic future with them." When Kathleen and I started dating a year ago, we broke all "the rules." I called her the day after getting her number (and continued to call whenever I wanted, as did she), we split the cost of every date, she asked me out frequently, we waited well beyond the third date before sex entered the picture, and we talked about everything. We talked about our views of marriage, children, careers, and spirituality, all within the first three dates. Almost a year later, we're madly in love and planning our wedding. Screw the rules.

My advice: quit reading The Rules and quit watching The Bachelor/Bachelorette. While you're at it, quit looking to Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus and Dr. Phil for answers. All that pop psychology crap isn't worth the paper on which it's printed (A rant for another day). I've considered publishing my own tome on dating. However, I'm not sure I can convince a publisher to accept a five page treatise.

Pg. 1 Be kind.
Pg. 2 Be honest.
Pg. 3 Be yourself.
Pg. 4 Communicate openly and honestly.
Pg. 5 Dating rules are stupid.

I can't wait for my invitation to appear on Oprah.