April Showers . . .

Bring gas masks, punk and goth t-shirts, musical mobiles, and diapers. Huh? Saturday afternoon my mother, father, and sister hosted a baby shower for STK and I. The first of what looks to be four different showers, this event was attended by our way cool alternative friends, grad school colleagues, and a handful of other friends we didn't know how to classify. Almost every person invited, both women and men, attended. The entire day far exceeded my own expectations. I laughed so hard I triggered my asthma.

The highlight of the day had to be the gifts presented by our friends from the local goth scene. I should have known they'd come up with some very original, and very sorely needed, shower gifts. S & K surprised us with their own line of baby fashions. They dyed white onesies and infant shirts black, then attached a variety of punk and goth patches. We now have an assortment of baby clothes displaying such diverse acts as NIN, The Cure, the Ramones, Bauhaus, and The Sex Pistols. Too cool for school. M & C followed up with a handmade Green Lantern onesie that matches my leather jacket! Like father, like son: In brightest day, in blackest night, no evil shall escape our sight! M & C also gave us a onesie with a patch from our favorite band, theStart, a pair of red plaid punk baby bondage pants, and a "P is for Punk" t-shirt. The most unusual gift, and the one most likely to land our child in therapy, came from J. J presented me with what he called, "Derek's diaper bag." Opening the camoflage duffel, I discovered a cuddly Tigger blanket, a working gas mask, metal tongs, a turkey baster, and elbow length industrial rubber gloves. Bring on the soiled knappies! Years from now our child will reminisce on his childhood and ask, "Did Darth Vader change my diapers? I have this vague recollection of some masked guy standing above me. I still have nightmares about it today." Do we have the coolest friends or what?

We also received a number of more typical gifts from various guests. T & J gave us an awesome metallic red diaper bag dotted with iridescent dragonflies (stk loves dragonflies). My folks gave us a hand crafted changing table (courtesy of my father and his most excellente woodworking skills). A conglomerate of my family members presented the most crucial Play N Pak, and STKs familial federation presented us with a Baby Bouncer and High Chair. If TLO was to arrive today, we have all the basics ready. Way to go folks!

One shower down, three to go. Where are we going to store all this shit?