All We Need is White Picket Fence

During our arctic sojourn to SMT, STK and I took a look at several homes owned by SMC. The school leases the homes to incoming faculty for up to two years at ridiculously low cost. Since we're new to the area and we're not really sure exactly where we want to live in the booming metropolis of SMT, we decided to take adventage of SMC's transitional housing. After looking at three different residences, we decided on this one:



The commute from our front door to my office is five minutes. On foot. In the snow. Sure beats the hell out of the 1.25 hour commute I presently make by car.

STK already has numerous interior design modifications in mind. In fact, she already made me check with the school about repainting (the interior is presently hospital white) a couple of the rooms.

Required Reading.

Motherhood Chic. We've been talking about popular culture representations of the U.S. American family at school. The hipness of motherhood is a new angle.

Coffee 101. Why didn't they offer this class when I was in school? Seriously, though, I'll have to give some thought to creating a class similar to the ones discussed in the article. Historically, coffee houses and salons have been a place of intellectual exchange and community building. Communication and the Coffee House anyone?

The Clash: Lennon & McCartney Redux? Were The Clash really a punk band? This author doesn't think so.

Remembering Hunter S. Thompson. Thompson never did much for me. Years ago, I tried to make it through Fear and Loathing and couldn't do it. More interesting, I think, is to try and understand why so many people were enamored with him. Thoughts?

Set Your Cathode Rays to Stun(ning). Some reflections on Sci-Fi's most excellent night of television. Since I teach with the guy, I thought I'd give him some props.

The Witches of Feastwick

Appetizer - Name something that makes you scream.

Bad coffee. It's not so much as a scream as it is a gag combined with a loud growl of displeasure. I'll take a sip of rancid coffee and then, "Gaaauuuuughhhh! That's horrible!"

Soup - Who is a musician you enjoy listening to when you want to relax?

Diana Krall. The Cardigans. Delerium.

Salad - What was the last book you purchased?

I think I bought three at the same time: Runes of the Earth (Donaldson), Green Lantern: Sleepers Book Two (Priest & Baron), and Clone Wars Adventures, Vol 2. The next book purchase will be, Uncommon Grounds.

Main Course - If you could live one day as any historical figure, who would it be, and what would you do?

Samuel Adams. Of all the rabble-rousers and revolutionairies out there, he's the one that touches me most (I also considered Thoreau & Sid Vicious). He was unflinching in his dedication to securing the rights and liberties of his fellow colonists; so much so, in fact, that he spent his entire life on the verge of economic ruin.

Dessert - Tell about a time when you were lost. Where did you end up? How long did it take you to get back to where you were going?

During our high school geometry class (with Mr. Hess), we always did those damn geometorical proofs. You know, the proofs that look shockingly similar to enthymemes and syllogisms from logic and critical thinking? I never undersood how to do those freaking things. Despite the help of Mike and Mr. Hess, I couldn't figure the damn things out. Talk about lost. 20 some years later and I'm still lost when it comes to mathematical proofs.

It Is What It Is

My last post apparently offended a blogosphere colleague. Sorry, but I call 'em like I see 'em. It seems there are some who take issue with my practice of using the term "bigot" to describe those opposed to gay rights. If I understand the objection correctly, I (and other proponents of gay rights) use the term "bigot" in an attempt to silence the opposition. Ah, the old "oppressors become the oppressed" argument. I'll respectfully disagree. My intent isn't to silence but to define an opinion espoused by a group of people as intolerant and prejudiced. According to Merriam-Webster Online, the definition of a bigot is "a person obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices." I believe I'm using the term properly.

Let's be honest here, the majority of the resistance to gay rights isn't based on anything other than religious. The entire debate regarding genetics or choice is an attempt to obfuscate the real motivation behind various intitiatives, referendums, and constitutional amendments. Grounded in their religious belief that homosexuality is wrong, most conservatives feel the need to try and legislate their morality on the rest of us. Based on religious ideology, some people feel justified in what I see as intolerance. Those opposed to gay rights are absolutely entitled to their opinion and beliefs, just as I'm entitled to mine. Those opposed to gay rights can keep preaching about an ideology of evil, the danger to the institution of marriage, and the erosion of public morality. All the while, I'll keep pointing out the intolerant spirit of those opinions.

There will always be a percentage of our population, maybe a majority of our population, that doesn't agree with same sex marriage. That doesn't mean the majoriy opinion is right.

I guess that's the thing that bothers me the most about this entire debate. Where does anyone get the idea that they have the right to tell two people who love one another that they can't enter the legal state of marriage? That absolutely mystifies me. Why is that anyone's business other than the two people who apply for the license? We're not talking the religious sacrament of marriage, folks; the religious aspect is something entirely different and should be left up to the respective belief systems. Speaking of which, I'm a legally ordained minister and will be happy to bless any same sex couple. I wish I could grant the legal state, but that's out of my power.

I think I'll just leave the argument that homosexuality is some kind of genetic defect in need of "treatment" alone. Talk about pathologizing someone's sexual identity.

Ideology of Stupidity

Well, if I ever needed another reason to totally discount the Pope (other than the fact that I'm not Catholic, of course), I finally have it.

Gay Marriage is Evil!

Are you kidding me? All the ills in the world and he identifies gay marriage as part of an ideology of evil? John Paul, stop with the bigotry and start practicing what your savior preached: love and tolerance.

It's moments like these that I realize why the Protestant Reformation occured. Sheesh.

Across the Frozen Tundra!

STK and I just returned from a visit to Small Midwest Town, our future home. While the cold air and snow swirled around us, the hospitality of the good people of SMT warmed our hearts ::wretch:: Yeah, the people were nice but it was DAMN cold. More about the trip when I get a chance to actually sit down and write for a bit.

In our next episode, STK and I face our greatest rental car fear* . . . the PT Cruiser! Nooooooo!

*Okay, this is actually my second greatest rental car fear. I faced my 1st greatest rental car fear several years back while visiting Salt Lake City. I arrived at the rental car company only to find they had screwed up and rented out all their regular cars. I wound up cruising SLC in a ::hangs head in shame:: minivan. I was single at the time--you can bet I dazzled all the goth hotties as a I drove up to club Sanctuary in my Family Truckster.

D-Day

At 10:00 AM this morning, I submitted my dissertation defense paperwork. My defense is scheduled for March 9, 2005 at 9:00 AM. Hard to believe it's almost over. A bit of editing this week, a couple weeks of brushing up on dissertation content, and I should be good to go. I'd say "bring it on!" but we all know how that worked out for George the Younger.

The Feast India Company

Appetizer - Name 2 things you do that you consider beneficial to your health.

Exercise. Vegetarianism.

Soup - If you made a New Year's resolution, how's it going so far?

I didn't make one. The fact that I don't drink/drug, smoke, and I exercise regularly really cuts down on resolution material. Besides, if I want to change something in my life why would I wait until January 1? Nonsense.

Salad - Name something that has happened lately that bothers you.

I was really worked up over some scheduling conflicts yesterday. After many emails and a couple phone calls, everything has been sorted out.

Main Course - What is your favorite quote, and who said it?

"To change ourselves, we must change the world; to change the world we must be willing to change ourselves." (Starhawk, Truth or Dare, p. 22)

Dessert - What do you collect?

I don't know that I actually collect them but I do have a nice collection of Green Lantern, Clone Wars Animated, Justice League, and Iron Man figures.

Nick Van Excrement

On a message board that I frequent, a very misguided Nuggets fan suggested Nick Van Exel as a good pick-up for the team. Years ago, when he decided it was time to leave Denver, Nick the Prick demanded a trade and then dogged it on the court. That's right, he quit on his team. He purposefully played half-assed basketball. A professional athlete, someone who gets paid MILLIONS of dollars to play a game, decided it was okay to force a trade by purposefully playing crappy basketball. The Nuggets traded him, of course. Nick Van Exel will always be #1 on my 10 Most Hated Athletes of All Time list. That shit is just LAME.

I'm obviously not alone in my sentiments. Check out the follow-up post to the message board "Let's Get Nick" suggestion. Music to my ears.

I won't bash you for posting the idea, but I will bash Nick The Quit.

He was on a winning team in L.A., but he wanted more shots, he wanted a fat contract, he wanted the spotlight. Dan Issel brought him in, gave him a fat contract, made him the focal point of the offense, gave him all the shots he wanted and even made him a team captain.

Naturally, this wasn't good enough for Van Excrement, as now he wasn't happy with losing. Funny how it never seemed to cross his mind that as the highest paid player and a team captain the losing was as much on his shoulders as anyone elses.

So he not only wants out, but publicly gripes about wanting out on almost a daily basis until he's finally granted his wish (the spoiled child kicks and screams until he gets his way yet again).

Then he found a situation he liked in Dallas......and they dumped him. Starting to think that you might be part of the problem yet Nick?

I'd rather the Nuggets lose every game left on their schedule than see them bring that whiny little a-hole back. Screw that loser, let him rot in Portland.

Since we don't have a player of our own in the All-Star Game, an event being held IN DENVER, dozens of Nuggets fans will sit around for the next few days and bicker about stuff like this.

Nuggets4Life!

War of the Worlds!

Uh oh. We'd better keep on eye on Mars.

NASA Asks: Life on Mars?
So Does the ESA

I've been following this developing story for quite some time. In the Fall of 2004, I heard a guest on Coast to Coast AM--I listen as I fall asleep--talk about a scientist who was poised to release similar info, much of which was based on the concentrations of methane, at a scientific conference in Europe. For whatever reason, the scientist pulled his presentation at the last second. If I remember the conversation correctly, the guest on the show speculated that the evidence was pulled for one of two reasons: 1) a last minute error was discovered in the research; or 2) suppression of data by the powers-that-be. The guest supported the suppression of evidence by governmental folk. There are those who believe that the "ordinary" person will be deeply disturbed by the discovery of life on a celestial body other than Earth. Theologically, the possibility of life throughout the universe presents some unique challenges to a number of religious belief systems.

As for me, I think the possibility of life on Mars is just plain cool. If life exists so close to home, in our own back yard, it's a pretty good bet that life exists in other solar systems. The worlds of Star Wars and Star Trek may be more realistic than we think.

Valentine's Day in Hell

The following is a real conversation from last evening.

Me: Uh, STK, how would you feel about modifying our Valentine's Day plans?
STK: What did you have in mind?
Me: Well, I just a recieved an invite for a free screening through the Film Society for tomorrow night.
STK: Really? What film?
Me: Constantine.
STK: Oh, yeah! What time do we need to be there?
Me: Screening starts at 7. We'll probably need to be there about 5:30 or so to guarantee our tickets. What about dinner?
STK: Popcorn for dinner.

Have I mentioned how lucky I am to have a partner like STK? For those keeping score, Constantine is not the only holiday activity. STK has a dozen roses, her favorite candy, and a personalized card waiting for her to get home from school. I awoke this morning to a card and a gift bag filled with my two favorite kinds of black licorice. Mmmmm.

STK, popcorn, candy, and a trip to Hell with Keanu Reeves (take that however you'd like--it could be his acting that's hellish) . . . a good holiday, I'd say.

Music to Soothe the Savage Feast

Okay, it's more like a feast to soothe the savage feast.

Appetizer What do you want for Valentine's Day?

A completed stack of papers. I'm presently grading 150 think pieces for Communication and Popular Culture.

Soup If you could change the color of something you own, what would it be and which color would you make it?

I think I'd paint one of the walls in my office green.

Salad What's your favorite day of the week and why?

Friday. It's the beginning of my weekend (my last day of teaching is Thursday) and I'm typically very productive.

Main Course What excuse do you use most often?

"Shoot. I have a stack of papers to grade."

Dessert Name something or someone you feel sorry for.

Governor Owens. I can't begin to imagine what it's like to be that stupid. I don't feel like ranting about him right now, but let's just say my hatred of him increased exponentially when he uttered the words, "We may need revisit tenure laws in Colorado."

Yersinia pestis . . . Wanna Touch It?

While most people surround their children with teddy bears and pastel colors, we've decided to go with something a little more unique.

Godzilla Plush Toys!

Microbe Mania

Nothing says love like a plush Godzilla and Hedorah. Gigan, Anguirus, and Mothra are also on the list. King Ghidorah would be AWESOME but that toy is a little difficult to find--some are selling for $60+. A little steep for a toy that will surely be coated in slobber.

STK thinks the Bed Bug and Bookworm are must haves. Can you imagine saying "don't let the bed bugs bite!" and throwing that thing into the bed with a child! That joke will work into the early teen years. Never ending jocularity, I tell you. Personally, I'm kind of partial to The Black Death. Can you imagine the look on someone's face during the following conversation.

Adult: Aaawwwww. That's a cute toy.
TLO: That's Black Death!
Adult: ::stunned:: Uh, what?
TLO: It's the bubonic plague!
Adult: ::nervous laughter::
TLO: Its proper name is yersinia pestis. Wanna touch it?
Adult: ::pulls back and glowers at STK and I:: What are you teaching this child?
STK: ::ignores adult:: Derek, did you hear that? He pronounced yersinia pestis correctly! Nice work, kiddo. We're so proud of you. ::big hug::

Other parents are gonna hate us.

I Have Constructed a New Dissertation.

Around 7 PM last night, I finished a draft of my concluding chapter. The Conclusion isn't anything earth-shattering and doesn't offer any discipline transforming theory; we're talking the basic "here's what I done did" type conclusion. Works for me--let's hope it works for my advisor. After watching the first couple episodes of Wonderfalls with STK (thank the maker for the DVD release of cancelled series), I reformatted every chapter to fit the specs required by the Office of Graduate Studies. All told, the dissertation comes in at 200 pages, a little more with the Works Cited. I'm meeting with KLM, my dissertation writing partner this morning--she'll give me feedback on Chapter Seven and I'll probably ask her to do a quick, on the spot, read of the conclusion. After an afternoon editing session, I should be ready to overwhelm my advisor with a barrage of chapters tomorrow AM.

My skills are complete. Indeed, I am powerful, as the Emperor has foreseen.

Feast Boy

Appetizer - If you were a dog, what breed would you be, and why?

Like Mike, I'd be a black lab. As dogs go, they're the most loyal, kind, and friendly breed out there. The fact that they're both goofy and smart makes them fun to be around, too. Where's the ball?Where's the ball?Where's the ball? Pet me.Pet me.Pet me.

Soup - What does the color purple make you think of?

Feminist spirituality, Hawkeye, and the Grape Ape.

Salad - Approximately how long does it take you to get ready each morning?

1.25 hours. I get up, shower, feed the animals, finalize the wardrobe, spend 15 minutes sipping coffee/reading news/checking email, take the dogs out, kiss STK goodbye, and hit the road by 6:15.

Main Course - How many cousins do you have, and are you close to them?

Eight, I think. I keep tabs on my three maternal cousins. I'm lucky if I see the paternal cousins once every couple of years. Despite my lack of real contact with all of my cousings, my life hasn't suffered one bit.

Dessert - Take your initials (first, middle, last) and come up with something else those letters could stand for. (Example: SFO = Sweet Funny Otter)

Dialectically Reconceptualized Subjectivity

Dawn of the Wireless Internet Age

I ran across this message posted on a live journal site:

Wireless internet has to be one of the greatest inventions of all time...
To be able to fulfill the urge of pooping and emailing at the same time...
Though the rennaisance times tempt me on occasion this would be tough to give up

Holy shit (pun intended) is that funny. Can't wait until I go wireless and can give that a try!

Summarize That

STK and I have scheduled a Presidents' Day weekend journey to the town, and it is a town, in which Small Midwest College is located. STK has yet to see our future hometown firsthand. We'll have an opportunity to get our housing situation finalized, we think. SMC offers transitional housing for new faculty and we're thinking we'll likely take advantage of that perk. I talked to Transitional Housing Guy several weeks back and the school owns several small homes throughout the community, a couple of which are right across the street from campus. According to THG, a three bedroom house that's approximately two minutes from the front door of my office, is ours for the taking (or is that leasing?). How cool will that be? Minutes from work and no commute?! What will I do with the extra three hours in my day? Did I mention that our housing costs, even if we decide to buy a house, will be halved? Yeah, we're sacrificing some aspects of urban life we've come to know and love. Still, SMC is only an hour from two moderate sized cities and two hours from a major metropolitan area (and we have friends who live there). So, we'll be able to get our city slicker fix from time to time. We're looking forward to scoping out the place for a few days.

One of my favorite cartoons of all time is now available on DVD. I am now the proud owner of Superman the Animated Series: Volume One. I absolutely LOVE this version of Superman. The series really captures the personality of Clark Kent/Superman and his commitment to help others, no matter the cost.

Not much else going on in these parts. The Little One continues to grow at what seems like an exponential rate--the last doctor's appointment gave us another "All is Well" report. I can't wait to geekify TLO. We'll have to have some very long talks about not playing with Dad's action figures. Why do I get the feeling I'll probably be buying two of everything in a couple years?

Summarize This!

I wrote the following earlier today:

In the opening pages of Chapter One, I identified the shortcomings of post-subculturalist theory and suggested the need for a new approach to the rhetorical constitution of the subcultural self. During the course of Chapter Two, I charted the development of a phenomenological understanding of rhetorical subjectivity and argued that Schrag’s notion of a performative self provides a new approach to examining the way in which active human agents negotiate the self after postmodernity. While Chapter Three outlined a methodological approach for examining the simultaneous performance of collective and individual subjectivities, my ethnographic description of the goth scene, Chapter Four, provided the groundwork for a thorough application of Schrag’s theory. Chapters Five, Six, and Seven detailed the performance of the subcultural self in discourse, action, and community. In this final chapter I return to the driving questions of this dissertation project: How are individual and collective subjectivities rhetorically constituted, negotiated, and performed, both discursively and non-discursively, in the realm of everyday human interaction? More specifically, how do goths, through the rhetorical articulation of affective individuality directed toward the other, engage in the rhetorical constitution of the subcultural self? How does the subcultural self simultaneously position herself or himself as both a "we", a member of a collective, and an "I", a unique individual? How does the rhetorical performance of the subcultural self contribute to the constitution of a subcultural ideology resistant to hegemonic cultural norms?

That's the opening paragraph to Chapter Eight: The Rhetorical Reclamation of the Subcultural Self. I also refer to Chapter Eight as The Conclusion. That's right, the last chapter of rhetorical analysis is in the hands of my dissertation writing partner for feedback. While she's reading/commenting for a few days, I'm doing the synthesizing of my entire research project. Estimated time of completion for Chapter Eight: Sunday evening. I plan on delivering Chapters Five, Six, Seven, and Eight to my dissertation advisor on Monday morning. I can't begin to explain how tired I am of this project.

Everything You do is Zen

Not thinking about anything is zen. Once you know this, walking, standing, sitting, or lying down, everything you do is zen. To know that the mind is empty is to see the Buddha...Using the mind to look for reality is delusion. Not using the mind to look for reality is awareness. Freeing oneself from words is liberation.

-Bodhidharma

The Path of Feast Resistance

Time for the weekly feast.

Appetizer - If you could have a free subscription to any magazine, which one would you like to have?

National Geographic, Outburn, or Rockrgrl.

Soup - If you were to suddenly become famous, what would you choose as your stage name?

Dirk Plasma.

Salad - What ingredients make an awesome salad? Dressing? Croutons?

Romaine lettuce and fresh leaf spinach. Add cucumbers, bell peppers, black olives, carrots, broccoli, julienned zucchini, garbonzo beans, and a bit of crumbled feta cheese. Top with a light drizzle of balsamic vinaigrette. Mmmmm.

Main Course - What do you like most about your current job?

That I get to talk about my academic loves almost everyday. The students with whom I interact are usually a high point, too.

Dessert - Who is your favorite instrumental musician (not a singer)?

Allen Vizzutti, jazz trumpeter extraordinaire, was my last instrumental musician obsession. I love classical music and jazz, but don't really follow a particular musician.