Handyman Negri

I'll let you in on a little secret: I'm pretty handy with tools. Anyone who spends time with me will know that I talk a mean streak about hating yard work, household repairs, and other handy chores. And I do. I would rather do just about anything other than mow the lawn, paint a room, or make minor plumbing repairs. My time is much better spent reading a book, playing a video game, grading papers, napping, etc. What most people don't realize, however, is that I'm actually fairly skilled when it comes to yard work and household repair miscellany. I have a decent set of tools--surprise, surprise--thanks in no small part to my father.*

Throughout my childhood my parents remodeled, or built from the ground up, every single home we ever inhabited. As their child, I was cheap labor. You name it, I've done it: framing, drywalling, trimming (cut & stain), pouring concrete, running electrical, installing an automated sprinkler system, minor plumbing repairs. The list goes on and on and on. The only things I haven't done are siding and roofing. The siding thing looks more cumbersome then difficult; the roofing thing I think I could figure out. In fact, I'm going to be doing some minor roof work when the warmer weather returns in the spring. I'll probably be doing a little masonry repair work, too.

Today, much to my father's joy, I spent the afternoon repairing our automatic garage door. The people who owned the house before us didn't maintain their garage door as required. Over the years, the garage door went out of balance, the engine had to work far harder than usual (the engine gets the door moving--the springs should do 90 percent of the work), and internal gears got chewed to nothingness. So, rather than call a repair person and buy a new door opener, I jumped on my local internets and ordered the part I needed. Feeling mostly recovered from the stomach ailment, I decided to spend my Thanksgiving afternoon at the top of a ladder. The process of replacing the worn gear wasn't nearly as difficult as I feared; readjusting the door after the process was another thing altogether. I spent more time adjusting the chain tension, setting the Up & Down limits, and lubricating the hinges than I did replacing the actual worn out part. Needless to say, the job is complete and I suffered only minor injury. At the end of the process, and I mean I was completely finished, I misstepped coming down off the ladder and crashed to the concrete floor. My left wrist, elbow, and butt cheek took the major part of the impact. The wrist and elbow seem not so worse for wear. The buttock, on the other hand, is getting sorer and sorer as the night progresses. I suspect I'll have a nasty bruise in a few days. I guess that's the price you pay when you try to save yourself a few bucks.**

I capped off the evening with a couple episodes of Farscape with STK. What an exciting Thanksgiving, eh?

*Although I'm loathe to admit that I need to significantly increase my tool collection. Now that I'm a homeowner, I can't call the landlord for the tiny little stuff that needs doing. A better drill, a good circular saw, a couple of decent saw horses, a pair of vice grips, and a good tool belt would round out the collection.

**Okay, I probably saved a couple hundred bucks doing this one on my own. Having someone service a garage door is not inexpensive. Trust me on this--my grandparents owned and operated a garage door company for the better part of 40 years. I suppose there was a bit of pride at work with the garage door, too. How could I ever look my grandmother in the eye if I'd betrayed the family legacy and asked someone else to work on my garage door? The shame. Oh, the shame. Garage door maintenance is in our blood.